The Wonderful World of Saiyuki, Part III of ... er... any integer that is more than or equal to 3.
~ sf

Preface :
By now, you must have figured out that we're only using Goku as a cover. There's no way that Goku would think about so much in the span of a day.

But using Goku's PoV is useful - he's naturally inquisitive and he doesn't know very much.

Goku: Huh? What?

Besides, using the other's PoVs would be more difficult - Hakkai's too smart, Gojyo's too cynical, and Sanzo is both of those and would probably shoot me on top of it, so I'll stick to Goku.

Sanzo: *shoots any way*

*sf dives for cover*. So to continue where we left off...

"Hakkai..."

"Yes?"

"I've always wondered... how do you drive if your eyes are shut?"

"My eyes are shut...?" Hakkai scratches his head and looks confused.

"You know.. you always have that smile on your face, and your eyes shut... it's a bit worrying when you drive, you know."

Hakkai looks discomforted. "I.. uh... I guess..."

"Oh ho! You're not really driving, right? Hakuryuu's driving himself! You're just pretending to drive!"

Hmph. I never thought that Hakkai would pull something like that on us. I mean, I always thought of Hakkai as the--

Wait a minute, this is 'You can't tell what's behind my smile' Hakkai we're talking about? I should have known better...

"And that's why Hakuryuu has only one pedal for acceleration and braking! I *knew* that normal jeeps need two!"

Hakkai's smile becomes a little strained. "Um.."

"Kyu?" Hakuryuu perks up and gives me an odd look. Then launches off Hakkai's shoulder to hover in the air.

It must be a good day, because Hakuryuu's staying aloft *without* flapping his wings (and we're indoors, so there isn't a breath of wind to help him.) He doesn't do that all the time, but when he does, it's just *freaky*.

"Yeah, so why *do* you keep up this pretense?" I ask Hakkai, trying to divert my mind (and eyes) away from the levitating dragon.

"I still have to read the maps and give directions," Hakkai improvises hastily.

Speaking of maps..

"Where do you get maps from? Considering that there aren't many cars ... or ANY cars around, it's amazing how we can get maps ... ROAD maps, even for the most remote foothills."

"Spandex space," Hakkai replies, unfazed.

"Wha--?"

"That's right. Every now and then, I reach into my spandex space, and if we're lucky, presto! We have a map. It works like Sanzo's newspapers, except that his spandex space doesn't dare to malfunction. Of course that means that when Sanzo wants a map, his spandex space is always happy to oblige him."

All this is starting to get a bit confusing, so I'll just listen to that inner voice that's been clamoring for attention for some time now...

"What's a presto, and is it good to eat?"

[The next day]

"We go!"

"Without breakfast?!"

"We don't have time for breakfast."

Of course not. Sanzo doesn't *eat*. Well, maybe he does, once a week, or something, but other times, he just drinks. Beer, for preference, although he'll imbibe anything that has alcohol in it, short of lens cleaner. And when he's pissed off, he misses entire meals. Scary, scary, scary. He must have a stomach of steel.

Still, since it means extra food for me, I'm not complaining.

Gripe : Hakuryuu shouldn't require food! He spends more than half his time as a jeep, and should therefore run on fuel, High Octane or whatever..!

"But there aren't any gas stations around, Goku."

[Goku jumps a foot into the air].

"Hakkai! Don't do that!"

"Do what?"

"Read my mind!"

"Oh.." a slightly embarrassed grin. "Well, but you think so loudly.."

"It's not like you eat much either."

"Hm?"

Yes, Hakkai can subsist on sake, if it's available in sufficient quantities. Not to the extent that Sanzo survives solely on beer and cigarettes, but still to a large extent. But as I said, I'm not complaining..

And while we're on habits, consider the fact that, to Sanzo, sleep is an optional extra. He can spend the *entire* night just sitting up and scowling at the window when it rains, instead of just sleeping it off, like any sane and rational person would do. No, he has to sit on the conveniently present window sill and spend the entire night watching the rain. He can wake up in the middle of the night and not go back to sleep again. And you'd think that all that travelling would tire him out..

Sometimes, I think that the only time he actually sleeps is when someone forcibly knocks him out.

"GOKU! DO YOU WANT TO GET LEFT BEHIND?!"

"Eep!"

[Goku leaps into Jiipu just as Hakkai hits the accelerator. And promptly falls out again.]

"Hakkai! You've left the bakazaru behind again!" Gojyo calls.

"OY! HAKKAI! You did that on purpose, didn't you?!"

"Next time, hurry the &$%@ up," Sanzo snarls.

"Yes... Sanzo-sama.."

[Sometime later...]

Sanzo glances up. "Youkai ahead."

Ah, and the Sanzo-youkai radar's never wrong..

[Just round the bend, a youkai roadblock emerges]

"You certainly took your time," the youkai leader calls.

Damn, am I tired of that line or what? "Yeah, who said that we have to follow your schedule? Who said that we have a schedule, anyway? This is a free-and-easy trip, not some half-baked package tour!"

[Bemused looks all round].

"In fact, since I skipped breakfast just to be on time to catch you lot, you'd better make it up to me!"

Leaping out Hakuryuu, I summon Nyoibou with one hand, flick it around several times to show off the great animation-- I mean, my great staff-wielding skills, and charge the entire roadblock.

"Quick head count.. we're outnumbered 10 to 1," Hakkai says from somewhere behind. "Not bad odds, considering."

"They could do a lot better than that," Gojyo smirks.

"Just shut up and start clearing the way, will you?" Sanzo snaps.

[Sounds of a major fight, interspersed by gunshots, ensue]

"Sanzo, you might like to extend your magazine," I tell him.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Sanzo snaps, as he fires 12 rounds from his 5 bullet magazine.

[Goku blinks, looking confused.]

"Eh... I dunno, what did I just say?"

"Ch'," Sanzo swears, and reloads his gun. All the youkai stand at a respectful distance while he does it, none of them daring to attack while the Great Gun Reload sequence takes place.

"Goku! Watch out!"

"Argh!"

Distracted by the odd voices in my head, I miss a youkai coming up from behind...

..Ow ow ow.. that's gotta hurt! Nothing hurts like youkai claws right across your jugular..

A gunshot erupts with a nerve-jangling bang.

Abruptly, the youkai who sneaked up behind me falls in a spray of blood from a single bullet, then vanishes to conserve RAM on the-- I mean, just.. disappears, k?! Argh!

Hakkai-the-field-medic rushes over. "Goku, are you okay?"

"Yes.. yes, I am." The blood clots at the speed of thought. When all this is over, I won't even have a scar. No point in being a hero if you don't have remarkable regenerative powers, ne?

"Well, that's the last of them," Gojyo called. "How many did you guys get?"

"10 exactly," Hakkai replies.

"Hey, I only got 9!" I cry, furious at being cheated of my one youkai.

"That's because you let him get you before you got him," Sanzo points out.

"You stole one of mine!"

"Well, you can have him back, in triplicate, the next time." Sanzo reloads, snaps the magazine back into place, and does the usual Stare-off-into-the-West pose that he always assumes after any major fight.

"Let's go."

--

Special thanks to Shirin for the blood-clotting idea, which offshooted into the 'regenerative capabilities idea'.

Did you know that the moon is *also* full in Requiem, the movie? They even make special mention of it. ^^

I've also figured out the mystery that is Sanzo's hair. His fringe points in whichever direction he's facing. If it's a side shot of the left side of his face, that forelock will be pointing towards you - ie : towards the left, and his parting will be on the right. Ditto if it's a frontal shot and he's glancing off to the left / right. If he's looking straight at the camera, it's a 50-50 chance. *beams*.

The way that that forelock stays up without getting flattened is a mystery in itself. It probably has something to do with the fact that his parting keeps changing side, so the hair doesn't have time to get used to one direction (which would result in it flattening instead of standing nicely, the way it does now, since Sanzo doesn't exactly have steel-wool for hair, nor does he appear to use gel).

I'm still working on the Gojyo ponytail thing...

~sf, 2002.