Disclaimer: How awful would it be it I owned Saiyuki? Consider yourselves lucky.
Exegesis
When he’s home, Sha Gojyo sleeps in until late, ‘cause he’s home and that’s what Sha Gojyo does, and there’s no point whatsoever in dragging his lazy arse out of bed until it’s considered acceptable to crack open the beer. Of course, beer at any time is one of his several unspoken mottos, the others mostly involving sex, women, shut-up-when-that-damned-“monk”-has-that-damned-gun-out, or Hakkai. And Sha Gojyo sleeps in late at home, ‘cause he’s home, and that’s what Sha Gojyo does.
But when’s he’s not at home, Gojyo wakes up early — earlier even than Hakkai does — and more importantly, earlier than the girl sleeping lightly naked beside him. Nothing but a sheet, and sometimes not even that, separates the world from a lovely free show — and often it’s not as lovely a show as it was last night. Funny, the effects of alcohol, if you think about it, but Gojyo tries not to.
Some mornings (no, it’s not morning until noon), Sha Gojyo wakes in some unknown corner of some unidentified bar, with half his brain in China and the other half clawing back that castle left behind in India. Sometimes his body hurts in places he didn’t know existed — hadn’t remembered they existed since his last really, really really bad hangover, maybe a week or two ago. Some mornings, the barman stumbles over, as pissed as Gojyo, and tells him to fuck the fucking hell off, get the fuck out of my fucking bar you fucking arsehole, and Gojyo falls asleep until the sun can’t quite decide if it’s morning or afternoon. But only some mornings. Sha Gojyo has enough dignity — enough ego — to keep himself off of the floor. Most of the time.
And when Gojyo gets home, he’s usually in time for breakfast — if he’s really unlucky, he’ll only make it to lunch. And sometimes, it's worth it. On those days, Hakkai makes sukiyaki, and Sha Gojyo decides that getting so thoroughly pissed that even in the morning, one might have a rather insignificant fiasco when it comes to walking, is most definitely worth it.
If the day continues down its usual path, they might go shopping for groceries together, but sometimes, Hakkai requests that his roommate go alone. Suggested, only, with an extensive list left conspicuously on the kitchen table, or taped on the fridge near the beer. ("I know...rice, noodles, ah, soy sauce, right?...er...cigarettes?" "Just let me write it all down, Gojyo..."). Alone, Gojyo leaves after lunch, but if his 'Kai decides to come too, they'll leave just before and eat on their way. They can afford to now, after the journey West: Gojyo thoroughly expected the so-called monk to keep the whole reward (Hakkai, of course, had known better, and shook his head smilingly), but the blond had in the end shoved more than their share towards them, his countenance blank but a blush rising very faintly up his pale cheeks. ("Take it. You deserve a bit of it.") Within seconds the man had headed off, refusing to say another word. ("Take care, Sanzo." "Come on, Goku.") Goku had hugged them both, Sha Gojyo and then the tall youkai ("See ya, monkey!" "Oi, don't call me that, pervert!" "Now, now...I'm sure we'll all be seeing each other again soon..." "Yeah, well, bye guys!"), and then trotted away, following Sanzo obediently.
And then they walk to the shops, Hakkai selecting each item according to the neat list in his pocket without consulting it. He piles it up in Sha Gojyo's arms, who carries the mound to the counter where he proceeds, as a rule, to flirt up the cashier like he did yesterday, the girl giggling when Hakkai calls for assistance. He picks out a pack or two of Hi-Lites, without fail, and throws them onto the heap. And as Hakkai pulls out his wallet, Gojyo somehow manages to collect only the heavier paper bags, and somehow Hakkai has only to carry the lightest, and they head home.
And then when they get home, they walk up every last stair just to put the noodles away, and every time Sha Gojyo wonders why he took the heavy bags. ("No, Gojyo, the vegetables go here...") Then Gojyo goes and dies in the bedroom for the next half-hour, melting in the sizzling heat, with the fan spinning crazily overhead like a drunkard, sounding like a helicopter take-off. Somehow, they'd managed to forget about the installation of air conditioning, or heating for the snowing winters. And sometimes he sleeps away the afternoons like he does the mornings, waking just in time for dinner.
Or sometimes Sha Gojyo watches the rain fall in the corner of his eye, his attention on the cards in front of him, not caring to win. Sometime he slams down a straight flush, but leaves his self-satisfied smirk uncontemplated, 'cause he knows the brunet just has to have a royal flush. ("I'm sorry, Gojyo, these things just -" "Just happen to you. I know.") The eternal losing never stops his grin, though.
And then it's time for dinner, and Hakkai disappears into the kitchen, Sha Gojyo occasionally following him, on the pretext of helping. Sometimes it's noodles, sometimes it's soup, and when Gojyo's lucky, it's sukiyaki. Sometimes Hakkai randomly invites the monk and his monkey over for tea, to celebrate something in particular, and there are meatbuns. They play cards; they pass around beer and sake - Sanzo even lets Goku drink, now; they share lighters and talk of old times.
But it's rare that they come, and usually Sha Gojyo heads out to lose and win his money. The women still come, but they don't come home; the money still slides to his side of the table, but there is not that same pressure as when Gojyo knows he won't eat until he wins. Life is different. A few rare mornings he comes home early. Some nights he just comes back late.
And some nights he'd just rather be at home anyway. And they stay up late playing cards, a quiet evening in, and Sha Gojyo knows he is destined to lose cards to Hakkai anyway. And when he's home, Sha Gojyo sleeps in late, because that's what Sha Gojyo does, and he's at home.
