Sanzo twitched, but didn't even look over his shoulder at the damned monkey. Gokuuhad leaned his chin up on his seatback and was nudging Sanzo's shoulder repeatedly with his nose, as if that'd help fill their bellies any sooner.

"Siddown and shut up," Gojyo groaned. He was sprawled in the back seat, hardly moving anymore except to complain that his 'ass had gone flat from sitting too long', and a three-quarters empty beer can hung from one loose hand. "If I have to listen to the stupid monkey whine once more, I'm just gonna fucking die."

Goku turned to glare at him. "I'm not whining," he whined. "I'm just huuuuungry--"

"What! You want me to die, Monkey?"

"Maybe you should!" Goku snapped back. "If you'd just hurry up and kick off, we could eat you!"

Gojyo leaned in, wrinkling his nose at Goku, tongue hanging out between slack lips. "Ehhhh, you want to eat me? No thanks, Monkey, you're not pretty enough for me."

"What's that supposed to mean!"

"No interest in being eaten by men. None at all." Gojyo grinned broadly at him. "If I gotta be eaten, I want it to be by a woman made entirely out of breasts."

Goku sputtered. "I'm talking about FOOD, you pervy water sprite--!"

"Yah, yah." Gojyo waved a hand. "Like you have the brains to think of anything else. Ever. At all--"

Hakkai's sigh was strained. "Now, you too," he murmured, coaxingly. "Just another few hours and we can stop for the night..."

"I don't want to stop for the night with the ugly monkey," Gojyo drawled, raising his beer can to his lips to drain the last. "Noooot interested. Now, if it were a woman made entirely of--"

"Yeah, well!" Goku almost flailed at him. "Maybe I don't want to spend the night with you either, you pervert--!" He shoved Gojyo in the shoulder and Gojyo choked, spitting his drink over the back of Hakkai's seat. Some spattered across the back of Hakkai's head. Hakkai twitched, but refused to turn.

"You little bastard." Gojyo said, sounding more shocked than anything else. "You -- you little BASTARD! You made me waste my beer!"

Sanzo found he'd bitten the filter of his cigarette off and spat both out over the side of their jeep, leaning over the back of the seat to snarl at them both. He shook his paper fan free from his sleeve. "If you two don't shut up, you're both going to die--"

"But it was my beer--!"

"Oh, look!" Hakkai said with bright, forced cheer. "There appears to be a roadside inn up ahead. Shall we stop a bit early, perhaps?"

There was a pause as all four of them stopped and seem to consider the possibility of an inn. Real beds. Good food. Baths, perhaps.

Separate rooms, for a few hours.

The response was unanimous.

***

Hakkai reemerged and came over to the car slowly. "Well," he said, brightly. "I have good news and bad news."

"Bad news first," Gojyo said.

"...The good news is that their kitchens were just restocked today, and they've just heated the baths."

Goku brightened. "That's good news!"

"...however, due to renovations, they only have one room free. It has one bed. They've offered to bring in bedding for the floor to fit everyone, however..." Hakkai seemed almost hesitant. "...And they're cutting the price in half in apology for being unfit to properly host this many guests."

None of them wanted to be the first to say it. Sanzo grumbled, clambering out of the jeep and, when the others followed, it shifted back into its tiny, dragonet form. "Well," Sanzo said darkly, "we've already stopped anyway."

"A good night off the road will make all the difference, I'm sure," Hakkai said. They'd been travelling together for two weeks now, and that was a little more of all of them than any of them would have liked. "Getting clean and comfortable and full."

For what it was worth, they seemed to mostly cheer up at that. "Race you to the food," Goku chortled, and was off.

***

"Hey! Get your hands off my food!"

"Ehhhh, what was that? Get your food off your hands? Sure!" Gojyo snatched a drumstick and took a large bite out of it. "Always glad to help a friend," he added, mouth full.

"You bastard!" Goku flailed almost helplessly, pointing at him. "How can you eat my food? It was my food!"

"Now, now," Hakkai interrupted, helpless.

"It was my food!" Goku insisted. "My food!"

Gojyou nodded. "Yeah, you're right -- it was your food." He grinned, picking a bit of meat out from between his teeth, then snagged a meat bun.

"THAT WAS MINE TOO!"

Sanzo leaned across the table. His expression promised more death than they'd ever seen before, and that was saying something. "Shut up."

They were silent for a long, long moment, and Hakkai breathed a sigh of relief.

Goku pouted at Gojyo. "I hate you," he mumbled.

***

That night, Hakkai joined Sanzo by the window. The sound of the other two yelling at each other had fractured the night, and little wildlife could be seen from its views.

"I'm going to fucking kill them," Sanzo muttered around his cigarette.

Hakkai chuckled, rueful. "Now, now," he murmured soothingly. "They'll tire themelves out soon and get some sleep."

"Permanent sleep."

There was a particularly loud shriek as Goku launched himself at Gojyo. "Perhaps," Hakkai allowed. "But, well -- perhaps this is a lesson we were meant to learn. About getting along, under any conditions. Unifying. Becoming as one."

Sanzo's expression didn't change. "More like the great lesson of learning that Kanzeon Bosatsu hates me."

"...Saa."

"Also, it's nothing personal," Sanzo said, squinting aside at Hakkai. "But I'm pretty fucking sick of your face as well."

Hakkai sighed, then offered up a tiny smile. "Well," he said, and turned to wade back into the other two, holding them apart and speaking to them quietly as he tried to calm them down.

***

"I'm going home," Gojyo announced over breakfast.

The other three blinked at him with expressions ranging from surprised to violent.

"Just not cut out for this," he said, and waved a sausage around on his fork, casually. "Fightin' all the time, no women anywhere. Not worth it to me. I'm just heading back."

Hakkai coughed. "Gojyo, it's not as if there really are all that many women around back home..."

"No, but I don't have to look at you guys all the time." He bit the tip off his sausage. "No insult, Hakkai. So I figure I'll just head back as soon as I can."

Goku snorted with something almost like disgust as he put his plate down. "Oh yeah? Where're you gonna find a way back, huh? It's been a two-week journey already! It's not like we can just--"

Gojyo shrugged. "There's a bus that passes few every few days. Stopping by today. I asked the barkeep. There's always a way back."

"So that's it, huh?" Sanzo leaned forward over the table. His hands were inside his sleeves, but that was far more of a threat of violence than if they were visible. "You're just going, fuck us and fuck the world?"

"Eh." Gojyo took a swig of his beer. "World's sorta pissing me off lately."

Sanzo's arm moved so fast it was hard to follow the motion, shaking his sleeve back and gun barrel pressing tight to Gojyo's forehead. "Gonna just leave us after coming this far already? Gonna just go home and fuck and drink until you pass out and the change gets you too?"

"Sanzo!" Goku started forward. "He's stupid, but he's not that bad, don't..."

Gojyo didn't move. "Was thinking of it," he said. After a moment, he grinned. "Heh. Gonna miss me?

"Like hell," Sanzo snapped. "It'll be a relief to not have to look at your face any more. I just thought I might need you."

"Yeah?"

After a moment, Sanzo lowered his gun. "Whatever," he said. "Go, then. I don't need useless baggage around. But just so you know -- if you end up giving up and letting it get you, I'll be the one to kill you."

Goku's hand closed over Sanzo's wrist and his voice, when it came, was high and tight. "Nah," he said. "I'm faster than you, Sanzo, so I'd get there first."

Hakkai chuckled, soft. "If he's going home, I've got the territory advantage," he said. "So I think it's most likely I'd be the one to kill him."

Gojyo grinned at them all over the lip of his mug. "Wow," he said. "I'm popular."

***

"Do you really think he's going to leave?" Hakkai asked. Gojyo had packed his bags earlier and headed downstairs, ostensibly to wait for the bus. Hakkai pitched his voice low to avoid being overheard by the somewhat distraught Goku -- not that he thought he could be heard with Goku screaming out the window like that.

"Yeah, you'd better go! More food for me, you pervy water sprite!"

"Eh." Sanzo took a long drag on his cigarette. "I'm not worried."

"You really gonna leave, Gojyo?! 'Cause you'd better mean it! I don't want you coming back to bug me some more!"

Hakkai raised his eyebrows. "So you think he'll come back?"

"He might or he might not." Sanzo said, shrugging one shoulder idly. "I'm saying that either way I'm not worried. It's gonna be loud either way."

"You hear me?! I'll kick your ass!"

***

It was about midday, and they were just packing to leave, when Gojyo came back in and dropped his bag on the floor again. "Oh," he said, unsurprised. "You're still here."

Goku seemed to brighten at once. "Gojyo!"

Sanzo tapped a cigarette out on the lid of an empty beer bottle. "Come crawling back, did you?"

"Of course not!" Gojyo said. "I just missed my bus."

"Is that the story?" Hakkai asked.

Gojyo grinned, snagging a good beer from the table and popping the tab. "Yeah, naturally. Got distracted by a hot babe downstairs. It's not a bad place, but Sanzo's got the card, so I figure I can't stay for another few days. I might as well keep travelling with you guys."

Goku wooped right until Gojyo snapped the tab off his beer and flicked it at his ear.

"Eh, whatever," Sanzo told him, exhaling smoke. "Just don't make a nuisance of yourself."

"Sure, sure. We ready to go?"

Sanzo stretched as he got up. "Almost. I'm out of lights. Have to buy some new--"

"Here."

He caught the pack Gojyo tossed him. "...Yeah," he said, and pocketed them. "I think we're ready to go."