Reunion
A Saiyuki Gaiden fic
by Veszelyite
A/N: Contains spoilers for Saiyuki Gaiden. Mostly gen, and surprisingly waff-y, considering the setting. Sincere appreciation goes out to Nightfall Rising, for providing perspective and offering suggestions that made it better. ^_^
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DISCLAIMER: I don't own the Gaiden guys, in any of their incarnations or by any of their other names.
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Death was pretty much what he had expected, this time around. After all, he had been through quite a few of them, by now. ...And while not all of them had been as abrupt or as painful as his most recent one, they always ended in darkness, and in waking up here, in the large black room with a single door.
This waiting room was one of many, stark, featureless, and devoid of decoration or furnishings. Often in the past, the rooms he had occupied had been empty of other souls, as well. He preferred it that way. Occasionally he'd wound up pigeonholed with a handful of others as they all waited their turn to be reincarnated. He'd never understood the need that those individuals seemed to have, to talk to pass the hours. It was annoying. There was nothing worse than being forced to share space with some stranger who insisted on making conversation until it was time for one of them to leave.
"Hello, Konzen," said a quiet voice, off to his right.
Not a stranger this time, no. He recognized that voice, and knew without even needing to look that the one who had spoken sat on the floor beside him, knees drawn up to his chest, observing him with a fond little smile. That familiar presence radiated alertness, patience, and composure, all traits of the person that he had grown so accustomed to having there at his side. It felt like Hakkai. It came as no surprise that he was waiting also. He had been the first of them to fall.
When he turned his head to look, however, the person he saw wasn't Hakkai. This man had shoulder-length hair, was wearing a rumpled lab coat, and had glasses in place of the customary monocle. Hakkai's first incarnation.
"Tenpou."
The other man's smile became faintly amused, and he inclined his head. "In a manner of speaking." As he said it, Konzen realized that he was right. This wasn't entirely Tenpou. In the same way that he himself was not entirely Konzen at the moment--although his soul wore Konzen's seeming. He sat up, touching a hand to the center of his chest, assessing the sensation that had become familiar from his deaths before. The return of his memories. The awareness of other lifetimes. The combining of other personalities, melded together inside the boundaries of his soul. One more, to add to the mix, this time around. Genjo Sanzo; monk, priest, and keeper of one of the five sacred scriptures of Heaven and Earth.
He was glowing faintly, with a pale aura that was both luminous and steady. It was the mark of an old soul, with many lives and many lifetimes of experience. Many cycles of birth and death, stacked up in layers, covering the span of 500 years. Why did it seem that he had made such a habit of dying young? Tenpou's aura was slightly brighter, slightly less stable. Fewer lives, Konzen knew, and fewer chances, by way of Heaven's reckoning, to attain enlightenment.
"Hey, onii-san. Don't forget about me."
Kenren was here, too, standing behind Tenpou and leaning one hand on the former marshal's shoulder. There was no kami-mark on Kenren's forehead now--that had been removed as part of his sentence, along with his immortality. But he had the same spiky black hair, greatcoat, and superior smile. ...And an aura that seethed with color, from fewer lives and fewer lessons learned. As with Tenpou, Konzen recognized that this wasn't just Kenren, but Gojyo, too--and three or four others that he knew from crossing paths with them in previous lives. Tenpou's hand rested lightly atop Kenren's on his shoulder. Konzen noticed it, and different fragments of previous personalities responded with a twinge of amusement, a twinge of disgust, a twinge of jealousy. It was strange to suddenly remember so much, after not remembering anything for so long.
The sensations made him feel off-balance, disoriented, and a little dizzy. He responded by sniping at the cause. "It would figure, now that you two have your memories back again, that I would get stuck in the same room."
Kenren smirked at Konzen, obviously having noted the source of his discomfort. "Are you jealous?"
"Of you? Certainly not."
The smirk deepened, and he draped an arm ostensibly around Tenpou's shoulder. "No, of him."
Konzen thought he knew exactly which of his incarnations the former general might have in mind. ...And didn't dignify the comment with a response. He rubbed at his temples absently. This whole situation was starting to give him a headache. "We haven't ever met here before," he stated bluntly.
"I believe that this is the first instance where the three of us have all died at nearly the same time," Tenpou observed.
It was true. This was the first time the fates and deaths of their earthly forms had intertwined so completely. However, Konzen suspected that it was far more than chance that had drawn the three of them together, to this one room out of countless others. Karma...or perhaps the meddling of a certain bodhisattva who would no doubt enjoy gazing into the surface of a peaceful lotus pond to witness the spectacle. The old hag.
They had been successful in the journey to the west and in their mission--Konzen knew that somehow, though he had not lived long enough himself to see the journey's ultimate completion. Goku had been the one to finish it, had been the one to enter the final room, to face and fight Gyuumao alone, to kill him and destroy the items and equipment that had made his resurrection possible.
Goku wasn't here.
Tenpou caught him surveying the room, and opened his mouth to say something. Before he could, Konzen interrupted quickly, covering. "Where's your commanding officer?"
"Goujun?" Tenpou looked startled for a moment, then shrugged ruefully. "Well, he's always been pretty good at minding his own business and staying out of the line of enemy fire. I imagine one or another of us will see Jeep again, eventually."
Silence fell between them, as both of them dropped the subject. Konzen continued to cast surreptitious glances around the room, which Tenpou noted, but graciously chose to overlook. Konzen didn't want to ask, he really didn't. But he couldn't help himself, the question spilling out of him before he could stop it. "Goku?"
Tenpou shook his head. "I haven't seen him," he said. "I thought perhaps the journey to the west might have ended for him the same way it ended for us. However, it's more than likely that he's still alive. Nataku was able to kill Gyuumao, and lived. Nataku and Goku were always very similar in their level of power."
Konzen remembered. He had started listening to the rumors in Heaven, back then, and heard about Nataku's return. The Toushin Taishi had survived his battle with Gyuumao, but had been seriously wounded in the process, and had taken a long time to recover. Goku....
...Is not my concern any more, he reminded himself forcibly. It would do no good to continue think about him, or dwell on the fact that, in the incarnation of Genjo Sanzo, he had finally gotten to see the brat again. Goku could be annoying as hell sometimes, but still.... Once Konzen was reincarnated, he would loose all memory of his previous lives, and there was no guarantee that he would run into Goku in his next life, or next several lives. It surprised him a little, how heavy his heart felt at that realization.
"So," Kenren threw himself down on the floor beside Tenpou, crossing his arms behind his head, looking for all the world like he were stretched out in a grassy field in the sun. "How long do you think they'll keep us waiting this time? Minutes? Days?"
Konzen had been wondering that, himself. He half-hoped it would be a while. He would never have admitted it aloud, but some small part of him was relieved to see familiar faces again.
"Time has no meaning here," Tenpou answered. "They'll get to us whenever our names come up on the list."
"We got rid of Gyuumao, recovered the sacred scriptures, and eradicated the Minus Wave, all in one shot, in our last lives. Heaven owes us, bigtime." Kenren growled. "We'd better get cushy assignments, this time around."
"That would be nice," Tenpou agreed amicably, only half-listening. Then Konzen saw him go uncharacteristically still. He immediately followed his gaze to a spot where a new soul had just appeared, curled on the floor as if peacefully asleep. Something indefinable suddenly caught in his chest.
It was Goku.
Goku, looking as he had only a short time ago, when the four of them had entered Houtou castle together, at the final destination of their journey west. Goku's image was a reflection of how he had looked when he had died. Only now, he was glowing brightly, his unstable aura shot through with blinding, scintillating color. Five hundred years of living, but only one lifetime. A new soul.
"Damn," he heard Kenren mutter. "So the kid finally made it."
Konzen wondered why he felt so surprised, to think that Goku actually had died. True, that Goku and Nataku had been similar in power, and yet, while Nataku had had the entire army of Heaven waiting to bring him safely home at the end of his confrontation with Gyuumao, Goku had had no one. He had been badly wounded even before Sanzo had been killed. It was understandable, then, that he might have died of wounds sustained during the final battle with the resurrected demon king.
Tenpou was looking at Konzen, a distinctly mischievous glint in his eye. He was standing now, but hadn't started to move towards Goku yet. "Well? Aren't you going to go over and say hello?"
A vein popped out in Konzen's forehead. "Why is he suddenly my problem again?"
Tenpou only smiled. And as Goku stirred, Konzen reluctantly got to his feet and walked over to him.
"Oi, stupid monkey. Wake up, already." He prodded Goku with his toe.
Goku blinked up at him, disoriented. "San...." His voice trailed off, gold eyes widening as he gazed up at his erstwhile guardian. "Konzen?" he said in a very small voice.
"Took you long enough to get here," Konzen growled.
Goku sat bolt upright, staring, first at Konzen, then at the other two. A broad grin stretched over his features. "Konzen! Ten-chan! Ken-nii-chan! I remember you!"
"Hey, now!" Kenren's voice was indignant. "You're not a kid anymore, you should learn to address us properly!"
"Oh, I don't mind," Tenpou insisted, as usual being no help at all in these kinds of situations.
As he looked from one to the other of them, Goku's happy expression faded and became serious. "But...I died, didn't I? That's the reason that I'm here, isn't it."
"Yes," Konzen answered him, arms folded across his chest. "There's no other way for a soul to get here, except by dying."
Goku looked up at him earnestly. "I think...I had a choice. I could have lived if I'd wanted to. But...I couldn't let you leave again. Not this time."
Konzen could feel Tenpou's amused gaze on him. Kenren was grinning outright. It made his hand itch for the fan he had used in his last incarnation.
"I'm surprised at you, Goku," Tenpou spoke up, coming, unasked, to his rescue. "For once you didn't tell us that you're hungry."
Goku blinked at him. "I'm not." The idea seemed to confuse him a little. "I'm not hungry at all."
"Well, there's nothing to eat in this place, anyway," Kenren said, waving a hand at the rest of the room. "My pack of cigarettes is gone, too, so I guess it's good that I don't need a smoke."
The four of them all took up seats on the floor as they continued to wait to be called. Tenpou explained to Goku about this room, the door, and what would happen next. Goku, in his turn, filled them in on the details of everything had happened at Houtou Castle, especially the parts that Tenpou and Kenren had missed. When he finally ran down, Kenren started up, taking no small amount of glee in telling Goku stories about Konzen's previous incarnations--which made Konzen really itch for his fan. He finally resorted to smacking the former general across the back of the head with his hand to get him to shut up.
It felt right, for the four of them to be here. Felt right for them to have the chance to meet, to rest, to reminisce. Konzen reluctantly admitted to himself that he would miss it. It could be several lifetimes before any of them would chance to meet like this again.
"Kenren Taishou," called an official-sounding voice from beyond the door.
Kenren looked up at the doorway in surprise, caught in mid-sentence. "Already? Aww, hell." He got to his feet and then stopped, his face an almost comical mixture of expressions that he was trying and failing miserably to hide. "Oi, Tenpou...."
Tenpou's hand rested gently on Kenren's arm. "We'll see each other again."
Kenren's mouth twisted ruefully, almost but not quite masking a deeper, more private expression. "Yeah, I guess that's the only good thing about this stupid sentence, isn't it? ...Even if we don't remember each other, we'll still meet up, eventually. Well, you screwed up your last life pretty damn good. Don't make me come and clean up after you next time. All right?"
Konzen looked away. It was as much privacy as he could afford to give them, under the circumstances. Motion caught the corner of his eye as Kenren took a step towards the door. He shot a grin at Konzen and Goku before turning his back on them all. "Later."
Goku's eyes followed Kenren, until he was lost from sight through the doorway. A worried expression appeared on his features. "Does it hurt very much? To be re-born?" he asked.
Tenpou favored him with an understanding smile. "Sometimes. It's usually dying that's the hard part. In any case, one gets used to both, in time."
"What do you suppose our new lives will be like, Konzen?"
"How should I know? Don't ask stupid questions."
"I'd like to grow up to be taller, this time around," Goku said a bit wistfully.
Tenpou laughed. "Maybe you will, Goku. Maybe you will."
"Tenpou Gensui."
It was Tenpou's time to go, but he made no immediate move towards the room's single door. "Konzen," he said thoughtfully, "in all of your lives Under Heaven, have you ever once been bored?"
Konzen looked at him. "What do you mean?"
"Once, you walked around all the time with an expression on your face that said you were so bored that you might as well be dead. Nothing changed, every day was the same." Tenpou's eyes flickered to Goku for a fraction of a second before focusing on the doorway beyond him. "But things aren't like that any more. They haven't been, for five hundred years. So I'm asking you--have you ever felt that kind of boredom again?"
Konzen was silent, considering the question. Tenpou rose to his feet and turned toward the open door. "I was just wondering. Because, for the first time in all the centuries I've known you, you look...happy. It was good to see you again, Konzen." He started walking away, glancing back over his shoulder to wave at the two of them. "Bye, Goku!"
Goku responded with a broad grin. "Bye, Ten-chan!"
Konzen stared after him, as Tenpou disappeared through the door, feeling a familiar sensation of a vein popping out in his forehead. "Happy? He thinks I look happy??! What the hell does he mean by saying that?"
Goku turned to him. His gold eyes were darkened with unusual seriousness. "He's right, you know. You're different now. It's as if all of this stuff agrees with you, somehow."
Konzen tried to say something in response, but the words caught in his throat. It's all your fault, you stupid monkey. There wasn't any blame behind the words.
"Konzen Douji. Son Goku."
Goku perked up. "Did you hear that, Konzen? Our names got called at the same time! Maybe that means...."
Konzen interrupted. "Names get called at the same time. It doesn't mean anything." Only a fool would attach significance to the whims of Heaven. And yet...Kenren's words came back to him. Heaven owes us, bigtime. The gods were a capricious, uncaring lot, and Konzen didn't believe for a minute that their actions in their last lives had won them any favors. However, just for once it would be nice to think that the fact that the two of them had been called together might mean that they'd know each other from the beginning, in this life. He'd gotten rather used to having Goku around.
"We'll see the others again, right?" Goku said, as they started to walk towards the door. "Tenpou, and Kenren too?"
"It's likely that we'll meet up with them," Konzen admitted. "However, we won't remember this, any of us. Not until the next time we die."
"Konzen...."
Konzen stopped and looked back. Goku had paused a few steps shy of the threshold, his expression suddenly uncertain. The colors in the aura of his soul flickered and eddied wildly, a reflection of internal unease.
Konzen waited impatiently for him to move. When Goku continued to stand as if frozen, he gave a long-suffering sigh, and then slowly extended his hand out towards him. That hand glowed with a soft, steady light. The aura of an old soul, reaching out towards a new one. "Come on. I'm tired of waiting for you."
Gold eyes flew up to meet his, searching. Then he felt fingers curl over his own, immovably, inseparably; and those eyes lit with a sudden, fierce joy. "Yes."
They stepped through the doorway together.
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