Sanzo reads the newspaper
Too much noise. Bang! Bang!
Dammit. Need to reload.
Dimwit kappa. Stupid monkey.
Death is too lenient.
Which part of “execution for noise”
Don’t you understand?
I need a cigarette.
Wherever I look
It’s always idiots
As far as the eye can see.
Hakkai stares at the holes in the ceiling,
Reproaches like an old nanny,
His one eye smacking me
Like a wet paper fan.
As far as the eye can see.
Always idiots.
Painful fools.
The prayers inside me writhe.
It hurts, but remind me of your power:
Stretch your strange remedy over my scars
And erase my memory of the morning from hell,
The wrenching of holiness from the monastery,
The murder of truth, my only guide and friend.
Is there a prayer to take away the sight of his arms
- flung wide to hide me with his sleeves -
And then his open chest
Opened by a spear
Opened like a peony
With petals of flowing lava
Falling on my powerless face
And burning my skin and soul
Burning my foolish shame
As the sutra is torn from his back
And brandished with howls of triumph
Into a morning of pure darkness?
Then was I taught.
Now I am tautened,
Nerves pickled in nicotine,
Temper lacerated by argument
And the noise of witless fools.
Is there no comfort?
Print passes in front of my eyes
But there is no meaning.
The Abbot gave me the gun
To use against my enemies
But my black reason knows better.
The Smith & Wesson insures me -
Always the backstop of cold metal on my temple
When the tortured priest
Can no longer bear the absence of his god.
Stupid monkey – make sense
If you want my attention!
Appetite is not sense –
It is sensation.
Not sensational! Dimwit kappa -
Always thinking with your dick.
Why was I born with this sensitivity of mind,
Always to suffer from the burden of what others
Consider to be amusement?
The Marlboro reds are nearly through.
Hakkai is counting the dog-ends
Trying to stop my fingers flicking at the lighter
With his soulful one green eye.
As far as the eye can see.
Always idiots.
Always idiots.
Gojyo after a quarrel
Who the hell does he think he is?
Lizard cold, bastard priest.
How the hell does he get to me like this?
Arrogant prick!
How does he get to me so bad
That my eyes prickle
And my throat knots up
Like a snake in a bottle?
Screw you, Sanzo.
You don’t care about us –
Too damn tight-assed
To let your control slip
Just because we’re lost
Or hurt or feeling bad.
You always push us away
And stand to one side
Like we’re some garbage
Blown into your holy garden.
Screw you, Sanzo.
Bombshell bastard,
Golden cold n heartless
Out of reach priest.
Before I met you
Life was so simple:
Beer and cards,
Smoking and stroking,
Betting and bedding –
Easy coming.
Easy going.
Then the hunter appeared
On my frickin’ doorstep.
Oh yeah! Hunched
Like an eagle with
Purple eyes fixed on its
Despondent prey –
Not even on me.
Looked through me, man,
Like it wasn’t my place
Like I was air, a bad smell.
I’m strong. I floored him –
Had to help Hakkai get away –
But then the monkey hit me.
Priest’s pet! Priest’s pest.
Feels like there’s no escape now.
We’re all chained together –
I can’t leave you frickin’ losers
But staying guts me, man!
I don’t let anyone make me look small
But Sanzo always always really scores –
Makes me put him deep under my skin
Right where it bugs me the most.
And the more he pushes me away
The more I know I have to stay.
Man, it make me tired to think like this.
Give me a beer for fuck’s sake.
Bed time for Goku
No choice but bed.
Sanzo won’t let me stay up.
Boring.
Hakkai wouldn’t let me play with Jeep.
Says Jeep has to sleep.
Boring.
I like being in Jeep
can lean backwards
feel the air pull my hair
look at the sky
a bird upside down tree
upside down me
can lean forwards
smell the warm oil
in Sanzo’s hair
smells like sunshine
and pineapple pizza
Hungry if I think of food
Gojyo ate my spring roll tonight
Gojyo didn’t want more food
Wanted to make me angry
So Sanzo would hit me
With his fan. Cockroach
Gojyo -
Big red cockroach……
No good even to eat.
Eat
More
Tomorrow
Eat.
Eat more.
Eat.
Hakkai watches the stars
Look, Jeep! Such stars.
Did you come from one of these?
The orphanage I came from
Was - not special, not a star.
Nothing was special until
Kanan, until discovering love.
And then loss and madness
And murder and remorse.
And change to a demon.
Though my heart is still my own
Still wanting to walk away
Into the big nothing and die.
Last time, Gojyo saved me -
Picked me up and nursed me
In his scruffy playboy home.
Didn’t even smoke in my coma.
They’d be better off without me.
I tidy and nag and shop and cook
But they need me to heal them
Sometimes.
You’re the biggest reason for me to stay;
You’re what makes me special to them
But why did you choose me?
What made me special to you?
I’ve changed so much since - then.
I only have one eye now, Jeep,
But already I see further than the stars
Into the future we have together.
