Naruto not mine, etcetera and so on.

The time had come. The battle stage was set. Two opponents faced off, jaws set, weapons at the ready, muscles tensed and hair-trigger reactions waiting for the other to move first.

The prize - a single coveted meatbun, waiting innocently there on its crumb-filled platter, waiting to be claimed by the victor.

"Lady Lirin, I'll buy you a whole basket at the next town," Yaone begged. "Please, let's just go before Lord Kougaiji realizes we're missing."

"He probably realized that an hour ago," Dokugakuji murmured, but quieted when she threw him a despairing glance.

"No way!" the two opponents spat in unison. "This is only the third round!" Lirin continued, clenching her chopsticks so tightly they threatened to splinter. "I'm not giving up yet!"

"Best out of five," Goku agreed. He'd already replaced his chopsticks twice. "You ready to lose yet?"

"You're the one that's gonna lose, monkey-boy!"

"Don't call me a monkey!"

Over to the side, Gojyo uncrossed his arms and pushed away from the wall. "Dude, your monk is going to be pissed once he realizes what's taken us so long. Not to mention Hakkai."

His only reply was the clash of battle as the two titans entered their fourth round.

The eldest of the five (at least mentally) sighed. "I refuse to be responsible for cleaning up this mess," Doku said.

"Oh dear," Yaone replied, as if she had only just now realized the state of the restaurant.

Lirin and Goku screamed gleefully and hacked at each other with their chopsticks.

"I have an idea how to get their attention," Gojyo said. He stepped away from the wall and over the busted chairs and tables and the unconscious waiter and plucked up the meatbun waiting so patiently for its savior.

He ate it.

Lirin threw Goku across the room and through the plated glass window and they resumed round four on the street.

"... I don't think they noticed," Dokugakuji pointed out helpfully.

Gojyo sighed and pulled out his wallet and put a tip on the meatbun-less, crumb-filled platter. "Screw it then, I'm leaving. He'll come crying for his monk when he's hungry enough."

"Same with Lirin," Doku agreed.

"But surely we can't just leave them here... " Yaone protested.

The side wall of the restaurant started to crumble as Goku repeatedly rammed Lirin's head against the brick. She was laughing rather maniacally.

"..." said Gojyo.

"..." said Dokugakuji.

"... let's go," said Yaone.

So they did.

---

An indeterminate amount of time later, our stalwart enemies broke apart for a well deserved breather. The sun had long since gone down.

"What round is this?" Goku asked.

"Thirteen," Lirin replied. "No, twenty-one."

He flopped back against the grass, arms and legs spread-eagle. "Man. I am sooo hungry."

She mirrored his actions. "Me too."

"I could really use a basket of barbeque meatbuns right now..."

Sigh. "Me too."

...

...

They both shot up simultaneously. "THE MEATBUN!!!1"

"Don't even try to make it there before me! You're too slow by a hundred years!"

"You're too slow by a million years!"

"As if! Eat my dust and weep, monkey-boy!"

"Don't call me a monkey!!"