Silvered Glass by Elvaron

Index

Chapter 1: I
Chapter 2: II
Chapter 3: III
Chapter 4: IV
Chapter 5: V
Chapter 6: VI
Chapter 7: VII
Chapter 8: VIII
Chapter 9: IX
Chapter 10: X

Chapter 1: I

Pain and exhaustion numbed the senses. Stretched them until the edges wore so thin that they disappeared. Pushed them until all the world narrowed to a single focus, a single object -- a human turned monster, a massive claw tipped arm, a feral grin.

A gun, out of bullets.

Goku yelled. If Sanzo had been able to think beyond the red-grayness seeping into his vision, beyond the pounding agony in tortured flesh that resonated with every beat of his heart, he might have recognized the cry as a name. His own; a warning.

Reddened pupils slid over to regard him. They held the same blankness that the Seiten Taisei's did: void of conscious thought, full of bloodthirsty instinct. Sanzo pressed the trigger uselessly. Once. Twice. Again.

The bolt of fire took them all by surprise. It seared past him, close enough that his deadened senses could almost feel the heat. It plowed into the monster before him, slamming it backwards to the echo of an agonized cry. It crashed into a rock in the distance, and there it was stopped, all its power spent.

Sanzo spun, surprised. He registered the pulse of youki then, heard the flap of wings overhead. He saw the two great dragons, hovering in midair, and all-too-familiar figures upon their backs. He heard--

"Kougaiji! What are you doing here?" Goku demanded.

"Come to settle a debt."

"Idiot," Sanzo growled. "Don't interfere in our affairs!" He hit the last word before his voice cracked, and with it, everything else went. His knees folded first, the injured leg giving completely. Dimly, he noticed himself breaking the fall with his hands, then his arms crumpled, and his cheek was against the hard rock, and blood mingled with dust in his mouth.

Red-gray vision deepened to black.

Voices chattered at the edge of his hearing, fading to incomprehensible whispers.

He drifted.

Light seeped past the blackness, green and gold, and he fell into it, welcoming its familiarity. He heard a voice in the darkness, a concerned voice, a wry voice, a commanding request to return.

He slipped away.

He returned to the sight of red evening, to the feeling of a soft surface against his back, to a world of renewed fatigue and pain. A man stood by his bedside, a familiar man, dressed in green to match his iridescent eyes.

"Good evening," Hakkai smiled.

He choked on the question, dust clogging his throat and clotting his words. Hakkai preempted him with two of the three things he wanted the most at this point -- water and answers.

"It's the same day," the other told him, handing him a glass, refreshingly cool against his fevered skin. "And... you should be up and about in a day. The main problem was not the injuries; it was blood loss."

"Cigarettes," he growled.

Hakkai raised an eyebrow, and politely bid him good night instead.

--x--

The years turned; the journey trundled to an end. They got a free and instantaneous lift back to the East, courtesy of Kanzeon, leaving Kougaiji and his sister to rule in the West. There would be a truce between youkai and humans, Kougaiji promised, all fiery, serious enthusiasm. We will not repeat the mistakes of the past.

Sanzo wryly reminded him that, prince or king or whatnot, he didn't speak for all the youkai in Togenkyou. Kougaiji simply gave them a dry look and threw them out of the castle. And they all went home, and life went on, much more peacefully than before.

One rainy day, Sanzo had a guest.

"Sanzo-sama! There's someone to see you. He claims you know him."

Sanzo shot the monk an irritable glare. "Who is it?"

"He didn't say..."

"Get his name first."

The monk scurried off. He returned later, apologizing profusely and saying that the man had left, and still hadn't given a name. Sanzo frowned, then dismissed it out of hand.

The need to buy cigarettes finally drove him out of the temple, rain or no rain. Goku had disappeared -- probably gone to town himself to stuff his face, Sanzo reflected sourly, and asking one of the monks to get cigarettes for him was more trouble than it was worth, Sanzo-houshi or not. He didn't bother with an umbrella -- he hated those flimsy things that caught when the wind blew and inverted or tore at the drop of a hat. He hated the rain too, but it was something he was used to, and it wasn't bulky, besides--

"Good evening," a voice said, as Sanzo descended the temple stairs to splash into the courtyard below.

He spun instantly, feeling an odd tingle that he momentarily failed to recognize--

--youki!

Gray rain slated down, dripping off the ends of silver hair.

"You."

Years had passed, and things had changed -- without the hat, without the robes, without that glaring pendant around his neck, Sanzo had almost, almost failed to recognize him. But there were only so many people in Togenkyou with silver hair and clear blue eyes...

...Blue eyes?

Sanzo paused in the act of reaching for his revolver.

"It's been a while, hasn't it?" Hazel asked. He smiled faintly, hunching down into the shabby black coat that he wore over an equally shabby black shirt. Through the open collar, Sanzo thought he caught a glimpse of gold.

"So. You didn't die."

"No." Hazel shifted his gaze away, staring into the distance. "I suppose I have your timely collapse to thank for that. Although..." the faint smile flickered across his face again. "I wasn't grateful at all at the time."

The question that had been boiling in Sanzo's mind blurted out before he could reconsider it. Hazel glanced up at his harsh tone, although where his eyes would have widened in surprise in the past, nothing changed in his expression now.

"What am I doing here? I came to see you, I suppose."

"To see me?" Suspicion colored Sanzo's tone.

"I can't..." a brief, aborted wave in the direction of his forehead, "...quite remember how long it's been. But, I heard sometime back that you were safely back in Chou'An. Since I was headed East anyway, I decided to drop by. After all, there are very few people I actually know here... Sanzo-han."

It was the last word that did it, the last syllable, that distinctive lilting accent that he'd never heard again since that day -- it ended in blood and fire and begins again, under the pouring rain -- Sanzo surged forward, grabbing at that illusive glint of gold he'd seen and yanking it free from the confines of the Hazel's shirt.

He stopped then, the sudden rage abating as he stared at the half-familiar golden design resting in the palm of his hand. His fingers closed spasmodically--

--an iron grip encircled his wrist, unforgiving and unbreakable.

"You don't want to do that, Sanzo-han. Any more than you would remove Son Goku's circlet."

Sanzo glanced up sharply, then down again at the pendant. Suddenly annoyed at himself for losing his calm -- blame it on the rain -- he dropped it. "For a limiter, it's too easy to remove."

"I'm afraid there was nothing else available on short notice."

"What--" he paused sharply, then considered in a calmer voice. "What have you been doing all this while?"

"Killing youkai and collecting their souls," Hazel replied lightly. He glanced up as the wind gusted, driving the rain into their eyes. The sting of cold droplets against their faces, of water trailing down their clothes...

...Oshou-sama, Sanzo thought, and then: another fragmented memory: My master was killed by monsters too, Hazel had said.

"Are you going to kill me, Sanzo-han?" Hazel asked mildly.

Sanzo snapped back to the present, suddenly realizing that his left palm was wrapped around cold metal, and the familiar weight of his revolver rested in his hand. Should I? He wondered. What are you here for? What are you now?

In the silence, the rain continued to fall.

"Well then," Hazel said, pushing himself away from the pillar he'd been leaning against. "If you're not going to kill me, I must be going. Good day." With a cheery wave, he tucked the pendant back into his shirt, and stepped away. Sanzo refused to turn to watch.

Retreating footsteps were echoed by approaching ones, the latter louder and faster and--

--"Oban dosu," a voice carried across the yard.

There was the splash of one set of footsteps coming to a halt, whilst the other continued, fading away into the distance.

"--You-- Sanzo! That was ..."

Sanzo glanced around. Goku stood by the gate, looking stunned. "Was that..."

"Hmph," Sanzo snorted. "Where have you been, dumb ape?"

"I got you cigarettes," Goku said distracted. "But wasn't that--"

"It doesn't matter," Sanzo said, and began ascending the stairs towards the temple.

--x--

[1] Oban dosu -- "Good evening" in the Kyoto-ben that Hazel uses. The 2nd sentence Hazel said to Goku in the anime, the first being Okii ni ("Thank you."), and, since Goku knows only Eastern Japanese, this was the term by which he remembered Hazel in subsequently.

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Chapter 2: II

"Have there been any mad youkai sightings of late?" Sanzo-sama demanded brusquely.

The monks standing before Sanzo Houshi's desk looked frantically at one another.

Sanzo-sama had, upon his return from Tenjiku, taken a renewed interest in protecting Chou'An from such attacks. Some suggested that he was following the Sanbutshin's orders, others suggested that he didn't want to see a repeat of Kinzan temple, especially in these troubled times. Yet never before had they had felt this sense of urgency from him...

"Not that we know of. Did something out of the ordinary happen?" one of the monks felt compelled to ask. While attacks by rampaging youkai had been common during the journey and for a year or so after, they had eventually trickled off and stopped altogether...

Sanzo-sama ignored him. "Send runners down to the town to see whether there's anything on the rumor mill. Or any word from surrounding villages."

There was nothing to do but acquiesce. They bowed frantically and set off, seeds of worry already planting roots in their hearts.

--x--

The next morning, Hakkai and Gojyo showed up on his doorstep. After the obligatory food tax extorted by Goku, they trooped into Sanzo's office. Gojyo took great delight in tracking soggy, muddy puddles across the floor.

Sanzo favored them with an annoyed glare. "What is it?"

"I'm hurt," Gojyo said, flinging an arm up to cover his eyes, and flicking water at Sanzo in the same movement. "We come all the way to see the great Sanzo Houshi-sama -- in the rain, no less -- only to be treated so shortly. Has--"

"Shut up," Sanzo snarled. "You blabber too much, cockroach brains."

"My, you're in a fine mood today," Gojyo observed. "Perhaps you had forewarning of the news we bring?"

"News?" Sanzo was instantly alert. "What news? And it had better be good, considering the mess you've made by tramping in here without bothering to dry off."

"So harsh," Gojyo murmured.

"It's not exactly 'good' news per se," Hakkai said brightly.

"You'll never guess who we bumped into today at the market," Gojyo said.

Sanzo's eyes narrowed. "Hazel."

Surprise reflected on Gojyo's face. "You know?"

"He met you earlier?" Hakkai asked.

"The bastard came prancing all the way up to the doorstep yesterday," Sanzo growled.

"Oh, so that's why you're so touchy today. And I thought it was the rain," Gojyo said.

"How did you meet him?" Goku piped up, from where he'd been engrossed in making friends with a pile of dumplings.

"We were taking shelter from the rain in a stall when he turned up," Hakkai recounted.

"Imagine our shock," Gojyo added.

"Well, there was mutual surprise, I gather. He smiled and said good morning, then ducked straight out into the rain again and headed off."

A frown had etched itself into Sanzo's forehead. "What happened... the last time? Didn't we kill him?"

"Or is he perhaps a shikigami himself?" Hakkai responded. "We don't know. After Kougaiji shot him with a solid bolt of fire to the chest, we assumed that he was dead. He didn't get up again, and the massive monster arm had disappeared. And while we were frantically trying to revive you, he must have slipped away."

Sanzo glared at the papers on his desk. "And he shows up again after all this nonsense is over. Using the pendant as a youryoku limiter."

"He still has that thing?" Gojyo asked.

"A limiter?" Hakkai queried. "But he's not exactly youkai, is he?"

Sanzo shrugged irritably. "I don't know the specifics."

"Ne, I'm not exactly youkai either," Goku pointed out.

"Yeah. You're a stupid ape," Gojyo told him.

"I'm not--"

--"Damnit." The slam of Sanzo's palm against the tabletop cut their quarrel short. "The bastard's up to something. Damned if I know what." He glanced sourly at Hakkai and Gojyo. "You two, find him and drag him back here. I want answers."

"See Sanzo-sama get all protective of his brood once he settles down," Gojyo chortled. "Considering he used to be Mister I-don't-give-a-flying--"

Sanzo whipped out the harisen and brought it crashing down on Gojyo's head.

"--Whoa! OW! I thought you didn't carry--"

"Sanzo," Hakkai interrupted. "And what did he say to you?"

"Nothing much," Sanzo growled. "Go find him, damn your brains, before he goes psychotic and starts mass-murdering. Or worse, raising people from the dead to attack youkai again. And take Goku with you."

"Why don’t you come along?" Goku asked. "After all, if he was looking for you..."

"I'm busy," Sanzo snapped. "Get going. And..." he glanced at Gojyo. "You can take that smart ass comment you're about to utter and cram it."

--x--

The rain was already abating as they set out, and the sun was slicing through the scattered clouds. They trekked towards the great gates of Chou'An, looking forwards towards the town. They neglected to look behind them.

A lone figure stood on the roof of the temple, watching them go. The sun glinted off silvery hair, and there was a flash of gold at his throat.

--x--

"We searched the entire blooming town," Gojyo complained, slumping into a chair. "He's vanished without a trace."

"Maybe he's moved on?" Goku suggested.

Sanzo gnawed on the end of his cigarette. All the reports coming in suggested nothing out of the ordinary. No youkai, no resurrections, no undead shikigamis wandering around, no sudden profusion of people with golden eyes.

But there was the faintest of rumors on the wind -- talk about a foreigner who'd been saving small villagers out in the West from the youkai hordes.

"Anyway, we tipped off all the innkeepers and told them to tell us if they see or hear anything about a silver-haired blue eyed foreigner with an accent. If he's still around he has to get someplace to crash for the night, or someone has to have seen him. Incidentally, we told them to pick up the reward from one Genjo Sanzo at Chou'An Ji."

"You--" Sanzo spluttered.

"After all, you're the one who wants to know. And you have all the money. So there," Gojyo grinned.

"Damn--" Sanzo stopped short as something gusted in through the open window and whacked him on the back of his head. "Shit what was that?"

Goku sprang forward to pick it up. It was a large feather, predominantly white, with a silvery sheen.

"Never seen anything like that before," Hakkai observed. "It's unusually large--" He paused as more feathers went floating down outside the window, to fall to the ground below.

"It's not molting season, is it?" Goku said. "It's only august..."

Hakkai stepped to the window and looked out. Apart from one last drifting feather, there was nothing in sight.

--x--

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Chapter 3: III

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Chapter 4: IV

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Chapter 5: V

Sanzo decided that if there were any life stories to be spewed, it would, firstly, be better to do it somewhere warmer, where there was beer, and secondly, that it was better to let Hakkai do it. Hakkai had been a teacher. He was good at this.

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Chapter 7: VII

It had been days. Sanzo paused from reading the pile of reports to rest his aching head on the surface of his desk. They had found enough small youkai enclaves to raise a small youkai army. Most of them former denizens of Chou'An who had fled in the wake of the Minus Wave, and were looking to return, or who had decided that a life away from humans were better for them. Several housed youkai still suffering from the madness, and those they had tried their best to restrain or kill.

But none were playing host to a fugitive bishop and his shikigami bodyguard. And of the duo, there had been no sign whatsoever.

A thorough search of Hazel's room had yielded nothing either, no conveniently placed notes or maps, nothing to suggest that something out of the ordinary had been afoot. He hadn't even packed what few belongings he still had. Open books lay across the table, interspersed with half-written scrolls containing notes on his research and the occasional scribble on theology. His clothes still hung in the wardrobe, mostly shabby black.

Damn you, man, Sanzo swore, recounting the last conversation they'd had. Looking back, it smacked of finality, as if Hazel had been looking for something or trying to say good-bye, and succeeded at neither. Sanzo wondered why he hadn't noticed at the time.

"Sanzo!" Goku appeared around the doorframe, half running and half limping. Sanzo shot him a glare, opening his mouth to give the boy a tongue-lashing for undoing all of Hakkai's hardwork in fixing his knee--

--Goku beat him to it. "We found him. I think we found him. We caught this youkai at last, and he pointed us in the direction of this great big secret hideout. It's underground. Huuuuge, and lotsa lotsa youkai guards--"

Sanzo was already standing, the chair clattering to the floor behind him. "And Hazel went there?"

"Yeah. Several other youkai confirmed it, friendly ones we found living around the area -- they said--"

Sanzo didn't wait for him to finish before sweeping out of the room, pausing only long enough to hammer on Hakkai and Gojyo's door.

"They're already downstairs," Goku said, rushing ahead of him.

He was too caught up in the grim sense of achievement to bother lecturing Goku about running. What the Hell Hazel was doing teaming up with youkai, and how and when this 'great big secret hideout' had been constructed, right on his doorstep too, ...were just a start of the questions that Sanzo wanted the answer to, right now thank you.

"And they said that they saw this great big person carrying a smaller one and flanked by youkai bodyguards moving into that tunnel. They say that they've seen him before, going in and out alone, so maybe Gato was secretly helping Hazel to set up this place before this..."

Something wasn't quite right in this mental picture, but Sanzo opted to reserve judgment. The answers would be in his hands soon enough.

Hakkai greeted him with a cheerful 'Good day', as Gojyo lounged in the backseat of Jiipu and looked smug.

"Told you we'd find him," he said.

"Shut up," Sanzo barked, taking the passenger seat and buckling the seat belt. "We go."

It felt like the journey all over again. The assault on Houtou castle, part deux, or the assault on Homura's tower.

Us against half a million youkai. With a few minor differences.

This was no castle. All they could see were a pair of door lodged in the cliff-side, patrolled by several guards of youkai persuasion. Attempts had been made to conceal the entrance by aligning it away from the road and somewhat hidden behind rocks, trees, bushes, but the glint of metal was clear in the noon sun.

Sanzo yelled at Goku to hang back as they charged, Hakkai and himself paving the way with their long ranged attacks.

"Not fair," Goku whined.

"There will be plenty later on," Hakkai told him, while Gojyo engaged in his favorite sport of monkey baiting. Sanzo ignored them in favor of summoning the power of the Maten sutra to clear the area in a hurry. Eyes closed, he pressed his palms together, recalling words that he had not used in three years. They came a little slower than they used to, the power curling around his fingers a little more sluggishly than it once had, his focus a little less deep than when he had been fighting on a daily basis.

Enough to make him aware that the fighting around him had stopped and someone had yelled an order. Banishing the power as quickly as he could, Sanzo opened his eyes.

The guards had fallen back. The doors stood open, revealing darkness behind, and a figure standing before them.

Sanzo felt his fists clench of their own accord, beholding that all too familiar garb and lop-sided smirk. Of all the people he had been expecting to meet, surely he hadn't expected this.

"You didn't die." Sanzo was briefly surprised at how hard it was to say those words.

"Is that any way to greet a colleague, my dear boy?" Nii Jieni asked.

"I see," Hakkai said at last. "Hazel was in league with you."

Nii raised an eyebrow. "Is that what you thought?"

"Yeah! It makes sense!" Goku chipped in. "You gave him the limiter. You're human. He wouldn't work with youkai, and you musta remade Gato for him..." his words trailed away as Nii slapped a hand against his forehead and started laughing.

"I would love to know where you got that idea from," he chuckled. "Oh dear. What a misunderstanding we seem to have. And here I thought you were a rescue team. Turns out that you think you're playing police." He grinned at Sanzo. "But no matter, since the end result is the same."

"What do you mean?" Goku demanded.

"You are right about one thing. His Reverence Hazel Glosse has been guesting with me for the past five days. However, while he has been assisting me in my research, I wouldn't quite say that he is 'in league' with me, as you so put it. His cooperation comes most reluctantly, in fact."

In the silence that ensued, Sanzo could sense the youkai fanning out to surround them.

"Would you like to come in?" Nii said. "I'm afraid that Glosse is in no condition to come out to meet you."

"We'll kick your ass if you try anything," Goku said, tightening his grip around Nyoibou.

"Oh I assure you that if you would kindly leave my employees alone, they will return the favor. I'll even let you keep your weapons." Nii's bunny waved at them. "We're all intelligent adults here, are we not?"

"There is doubtless a trap," Hakkai murmured to Sanzo.

"Naturally." Sanzo swept forward. We'll deal with that when it comes.

Nii gave him a smile as he walked past, and fell into step with him. The door slammed behind them as they entered, and the corridor stretched out before them, sunless dark illuminated only by tiny glowing panels.

*

The corridor, after twists and turns and branches, led them at last to a larger room. Control panels dotted the far wall, multi-colored lights flashing across them. There was some kind of balcony, glass over looking another room that lay beyond, and a metal railing ran along it. Nii, silent thus far, gestured them forward.

Sanzo cast him a suspicious glance, before stepping up to the rail. He looked down, through the glass.

Shock raced across his features, seering away any attempt at deadpanning. Eyes wide, the blood-draining from his face, Sanzo could only stare.

"You did ask to see him," Nii said airily.

Sanzo barely heard the others' gasps of shock, and Nii's subsequent chuckle. He felt his hands grasp the rail, the cold metal biting into his palms as he beheld the scene that lay below.

Hazel was slumped on the floor, curled in protectively on himself even as his wings spread out behind him. The wings were clearly broken, primary and secondary feathers ripped out in bloody chunks and the supporting bones snapped. He had always been pale, but now his complexion had gone almost ghostly, except where it was marred by dark bruises. Heavy manacles encircled his wrists and ankles, short chains shackling him to the floor. In ironic counterpoint were the tubes, needled ends lodged in veins, carrying unidentifiable substances to and fro. There was blood everywhere, splashed across grey walls, staining white feathers red and matting silver hair. His eyes were open but glazed over, blue irises flecked with red. The pendant was clearly missing.

"What did you do to him?" Goku cried, pressing his hands against the glass.

"He is a monster," Nii replied. "And he tries to kill everyone in sight. In fact, I'm doing the public a service by keeping him down."

"He is human," Hakkai cut in, his voice low and deadly. "And no more a monster than any youkai with a limiter is."

"Oh? He's vicious even with the pendant. I believe Genjo can testify to that effect." Nii smiled at Sanzo. It wasn't a particularly pleasant smile.

"Let him go," Goku stated.

"Or what?" Nii asked.

"Or we'll kick your ass," Gojyo said.

"I don't think so." Nii snapped his fingers, and all four took an involuntary step back as a massive shadow appeared silently at the scientist's shoulder.

"That's--" Goku started.

"Gato, yes," Nii replied.

"It can't be! Gato would..."

"Oh, you know loyalties can change. Can be bought. Or perhaps he just decided that his former employer..." a derisive nod at the crumbled figure, "...wasn't such a good employer after all."

"It's a different shikigami," Sanzo stated flatly. "Made to look like Gato."

"As a bait to draw Hazel-san in?" Hakkai said. "And since he would not raise a finger against his long-time companion, it must have made things easier."

Nii shrugged. "Gato's size and strength are useful, no doubt."

Goku scowled. "We beat him once. We can do it again."

"Ah. You beat the first Gato once, while he was doing a pathetic job of trying to kill you. His successor, however, is rather more efficient. And besides..." Nii hunted around in a labcoat pocket, producing a small remote. Sanzo could feel the others stiffening beside him.

"You're going to blow this place skyhigh?" Gojyo said, trying for unimpressed.

Nii raised an eyebrow. "How simplistic. Do you know that 10,000 volts were just enough to stop His Reverence in his tracks in the beginning?" he nodded amiably in Hazel's direction. "Of course, in his current state, I highly suspect that it'll kill him. Especially if I hold the button down." A small smirk. "So the question is not whether you can kill Gato, but whether you can kill him before I electrocute your friend there."

"He's not a friend," Sanzo snarled, almost instinctively.

"Indeed? Your expressions betray you."

"Let him go," Goku said, stepping forward, and pausing as the Gato-double pulled out a massive revolver and levelled it at his forehead.

"Oh, I don't think so," Nii replied. "And unfortunately I can't let the four of you leave so soon either. If you would be so kind as to divest yourself of your weapons... or shall I ask Gato to do it for you? Oh, and the sutra please, Genjo."

Sanzo responded by drawing his own revolver. A bullet snapped off from the Smith and Wesson, then pain exploded across his jaw, snapping his head backwards and sending him crashing to the floor. He heard Goku yell above the cycling of a gun magazine, then his own hiss of pain as a seering circle of metal jammed itself against his forehead. The barrel of one of Gato's massive revolvers, still smoking.

"One move, Son Goku, and Genjo dies. And Sha Gojyo as well. In fact, even if both you and Cho Hakkai were to take off your limiters, you would not be able to save them. Or Glosse."

"Sanzo--" Goku's voice was strained.

"No, I don't think Genjo is in a position to advise you," Nii replied. "Drop the Nyoibou."

"Sanzo--"

"Do it," Sanzo snapped. There were hostages at stake here, and unlike some enemies, he did not think that Nii would hesistate. And doubtless there were other defenses hidden in this building. Traps. Guards. A whole army of Gato shikigamis. Not to mention the fact that Nii himself held a sutra and probably the knowledge to trap and bind Seiten Taisei Son Goku.

There were three clangs as three weapons hit the floor. Sanzo could hear footsteps ringing across the metal floor as more people approached. He bit his lip and allowed himself one long moment of self-derision for his overconfidence.

"I suggest that you go quietly," Nii said. "And enjoy your stay."

There was a pause, then shuffles. Reluctance laced every footstep. Sanzo stared up at the gun jamming his head to the ground, and ran through every expletive in his extensive vocabulary.

"Well then." A pair of bedroom slippers appeared in the corner of his field of vision, then there was a rustle as Nii knelt beside him. "Nice to see you again, Genjo."

"Bastard," Sanzo hissed.

"Oh, how cold," Nii mocked. "But I appreciate that you didn't come here to see me. In fact, I rather think I'll let you see Glosse. It'll be interesting to see how he reacts to you."

Sanzo narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "What are you talking about?"

"Didn't you notice? He doesn't have his limiter. A limiter which I made for him, by the way, so I was just taking back my own property. But I do believe I've found a combination of substances that reverse the madness. It's hard to tell when he tries to kill all of us, but perhaps he won't try to disembowel a friend. Most animals are hard wired that way."

"What are you doing with him?"

"Research, dear boy. Something neither you nor Koumyou ever appreciated, alas. It's interesting, isn't it? His constitution is quite different from a youkai's, and then there is that possession thing that reputedly caused all his problems in the first place--"

"--that's, at most, a minor project on the side for you. You're more interested in his ability to resurrect humans."

Nii smirked. "You might be right. I always did say you were a bright boy."

"Why didn't you just take the pendant the first time? Why did you even bother going through this whole convoluted mess?"

Nii's voice took on a cadence reminiscent of a lecturer dealing with a particularly slow student. "What is the fun in that? Control experiments must be released into the wild to see how they'll act. And he was inconveniently amnesic. I wanted to see if something would trigger his memory. And then we were all rather busy, as I'm sure you'll recall. But anyway." Nii glanced up at Gato. "Let's not keep His Reverence waiting."

The pressure on his forehead eased, as a large arm hauled him upright. The sutra was stripped from his shoulders even before he could voice a protest, and Sanzo had one glimpse of Nii's calm smirk before he was being shoved down the corridor.

It was a short trip. The corridor led downwards, round a bend or two, then the shikigami was shoving him through a particularly large, reinforced door. Sanzo felt cold fear seeping into his fingertips as door crashed shut behind him again, and he found himself standing in the enclosure.

He glanced up first. Nii waved from the observation deck, settled comfortably in a chair with a stuffed rabbit under one arm. Sanzo shot him a scowl, before returning his gaze to the crumpled form before him.

"We're cutting off the sedatives now, Genjo," Nii's voice crackled at him over a hidden speaker. "Have fun. Try not to get killed."

Sanzo stared at gorges in the floor and the chipped and broken claws that had carved them, and tried to will fear away. Hazel's eyes were mostly blue, with red streaks like veins radiating from the pupils to the edge of the irises. Surely that was a sign of sentience. Surely.

The glassy look in those eyes began to fade, as Hazel blinked. Once, twice. A ruined wing twitched, a claw scraped along the floor. Sanzo found himself holding his breath, all his senses heightening and tingling as adrenaline coursed his veins. The air smelt of blood and that sterile, chemical odour that had permeated the laboratories in Houtou castle. There was a sense of something else too, something vaguely like youryoku, only not quite.

Hazel shuddered, blinking rapidly. Then his gaze sharpened and slid to regard Sanzo.

Sanzo backed up against the wall as red clouded blue eyes and Hazel levered himself into a sitting position. The chains were too short to allow him to stand, let alone fight, Sanzo noted, and likely all the poisoned feathers had been removed, but there was something furious and feral in the blazing eyes boring into his that sent spikes of ice down his spine.

"Oh dear," Nii chuckled over the speaker.

Hazel snarled at the sound of that voice, tugging at the manacles that bit back into thin wrists. He raked furiously at the chains, chipping his claws further and making them bleed anew. Sanzo stiffened, wishing for the familiar weight of his revolver between his palms, or the sutra around his shoulders... something, anything.

No way out, nowhere to run. Sanzo had never felt so trapped in his life.

Hazel wrenched at the shackles again, and it was then that Sanzo noticed that... he was pulling backwards, pulling away. And that he was shaking, trembling uncontrollably, even as he broke a fang snapping at the chains.

It wasn't a killing rage. It was fear and a great deal of pain, and Sanzo felt himself wincing in sympathy.

"It's me, idiot," he called, staring at the wretched creature before him. Hazel snarled in response, backing away to the limit of his restraints. Blood dripped from his ruined claws. Sanzo took a deep breath, and gathered what he could of his courage. And stepped forward.

It was ironically familiar, like facing down the Seiten Taisei, except that the Seiten Taisei probably didn't even know the meaning of fear. But it was the same tactic, trying to keep all emotion out of your own face as you approached, or he approached, and trying not to show the other that your heart was pounding desperately in your chest. Hazel was restrained, Sanzo reminded himself, and too badly battered to kill anyone in his current state. There was no risk here. Nii had to know that, or he would not have done this...

Sanzo knelt, just out of range of claws and teeth. "Hazel."

Hazel paused, evidentally recognizing that this wasn't following the script he was used to. Claws stilled in their futile attempts to pry the manacles off.

"It's me," Sanzo said again, trying for the calmest voice he could. There was a blink in response, and perhaps a flash of sanity.

"I know you can understand me," he said, because he couldn't think of anything else to say. Come on. Hear me out. Give me something to work with...

Red eyes stared suspiciously back.

"I'm sorry. I should have warned you. I thought it suspicious that Gato would return. I suspected that it wasn't really him... but... I had no idea."

Another blink.

"We'll get you out. And the pendant back. Or I'll get a proper limiter set up for you." Inane babble that he hadn't thought himself capable of, but nothing in this sterile world seemed real anyway. Hazel hissed softly.

"I said I'm sorry, you stupid git," Sanzo swallowed. "Even Hakkai can't get that out of me on a good day. What more do you want?"

A long silence followed that, as Sanzo ran out of words on a throat gone dry. Seconds or minutes passed, and the cloying smell of blood seemed to choke up his nostrils. He wanted to gag.

"Hazel?"

And finally, finally, the ruined whisper of a voice. "S..Sanzo..han?"

Sanzo felt relief wash through him. He flopped back onto his heels, breathing out as the red seemed to drain away from Hazel's eyes.

"Yeah. Me."

The tension melted out of Hazel's too slight frame. "What are you ..." his voice cracked.

"Not going to eviscerate me?" Sanzo allowed himself to inch forward. Slowly, he reminded himself. Nothing sudden.

Hazel looked away from him. "Why..."

"I decided to pay you a visit. See if I could get you out of here."

"Are you... a captive too?" Sanzo had to strain to hear the words.

LIE, his brain said. "I'll get you out. Come on. Pull yourself together."

"Oh, that's interesting," Nii's voice rang out, and Hazel abruptly tensed.

Asshole! Sanzo railed mentally at the scientist. "Calm down. He's not here."

Hazel's breath was coming rapidly now, as he scrabbled at the intravenous tubes. "Sanzo-han... just... please..."

Sanzo suppressed the urge to reach out and grasp the other's wrist. There was no telling what physical contact would do. "Don't pull that out. Not until I can figure out which ones are keeping you alive and which aren't."

"If you can't free me... please... kill me," Hazel's voice was edged with hoarse desperation.

"I'm afraid he's in no position to do that," Nii interrupted. Hazel's head snapped up as he scanned the area. "In fact," Nii continued, "I think it's time for goodbye. If you're good, I might even let Sanzo-han see you again."

"...no..." Hazel whispered. He glanced back at Sanzo, and the wordless plea was evident in his eyes.

I can't do anything for you right now, Sanzo stared back. "Pull yourself together."

The door swished open behind, and the shadow of a massive figure that was all too familiar fell over them. Too soon, Sanzo thought. Too little time... Hazel glanced up. "Gato..."

The shikigami ignored him, grabbing Sanzo by the arm. Sanzo shook him off as he stood under his own power. I'll be back, he promised Hazel silently. Panic was evident on the other's face, stricken desperation and fear and hopelessness that made Sanzo wish he'd never come. A look like that didn't belong on any one person's face at the same time.

"Don't... go..." Hazel lunged forward. The shikigami intercepted him in mid-lunge, catching him with a knee to the midsection that cracked something and sent him snapping backwards to the limits of his restraints before he fell, crashing to the floor. Sanzo started forward instinctively as several tattered feathers broke away from the main wings to drift away. An outstretched arm across his path stopped him.

"Bastard," Sanzo snapped.

"We go," the shikigami said, catching him by the arm and steering him away. Sanzo lingered a moment before he was compelled to move, long enough to meet agonized blue eyes that were rapidly clouding over as the sedatives kicked in.

*

"You asshole!" Sanzo snarled.

"My, my," Nii replied, glancing down into the enclosure. "Such strong sentiment for someone who you claim isn't even a friend."

"You sick bastard."

"How fascinating." Nii wasn't even looking at him. "Even crocodiles can be trained, you know. And humans are easy to break. I wonder if we could train him too."

"You don't train crocodiles by beating the crap out of them and pumping them full of drugs," Sanzo snarled.

"Oh, you really are the expert on the subject. Do you know that he literally tore two of my assistants apart? Limb from limb. Quite tragic, really."

"He's not a monster. You just had proof of that."

Nii ignored him, fiddling with dials on his control panel. "Can you hear me, Your Reverence?"

There was no response, but Sanzo noticed Hazel's fingers curling in, claws digging into the palm of one hand.

"That really was Genjo Sanzo, if you were wondering. In fact, he's standing right here with me. Would you like to say hello, Genjo?"

Sanzo settled for glaring.

"Oh, he's being touchy. But as I said earlier, you might get to see more of him if you behave, hmm?"

The microphones picked up the barest hint of a sigh from Hazel's direction.

"I'm sending in a couple of people to give you a brief check up. Try not to tear them apart this time. And stop clawing yourself, or we'll really have to file those nails down."

The door to the enclosure slid open on those words, as a couple of white coated humans stepped in, shadowed by the Gato-double. And Sanzo snapped. "You do that to him on purpose, don't you? Using a Gato lookalike to trash him..."

"It produces interesting psychological results," Nii said happily. "Even at his most rabid he pulls his punches where it comes to Gato. In the beginning it was pure practicality--"

--there was a screech as one of the orderlies applied a syringe. Sanzo glanced back in time to see the Gato-double grab Hazel by the neck and jerk him backwards, a forearm across his throat to cut off his air. Claws scrabbled uselessly against the shikigami's forearm, as Hazel struggled furiously.

"Still harbouring needle phobia," Nii shook his head. "But notice how he never tries to harm Gato? When someone else did that, Glosse took out his eye."

Sanzo's gut was twisting. Blood splattered as the ruined wings thrashed, beating themselves against the floor and loosening more feathers. "You could sedate him," he said at last. "It makes no difference whether he's awake or not."

"Training," Nii repeated. "Of course the more important examinations are done when he's unconscious, but we have to give him a fair chance to show that he can be civilized--"

Sanzo surged forward, ignoring the youkai guards behind him. He managed to deck Nii a fine one across the jaw before hands hauled him backwards.

"'Fair chance' my ass!" Sanzo yelled.

"He'll just have to learn to control himself, won't he?" Nii replied calmly, gently massaging his jaw. "That's what this entire experiment is about, after all."

"You're destroying him in the name of experimentation?"

Nii raised an eyebrow and tsked. "It is for the good of Tougenkyou, Genjo. These results are applicable to Minused youkai. Wouldn't it be nice if Son Goku and Cho Hakkai never had to wear limiters again?"

Sanzo glared at him with narrowed eyes, feeling dread pool anew in his heart. "You're not going to experiment on them."

"They were kind enough to volunteer. And, of course, a half youkai is always an interesting quandary. What exactly is it about his human side that saved him from the madness of the Minus Waves? There's a whole field to explore here, if only you'll stick around. In the meantime..." Nii returned his attention to the enclosure.

Hazel had finally gone limp in the shikigami's stranglehold, staring up at the ceiling, chest heaving as he struggled for breath. His eyes were so wide that Sanzo could see the whites around his irises -- a curious shade of purple now. He was trembling as the orderlies splinted and set the bones in his wings, shivering so hard that Sanzo could hear the faint jingle of the chains over the microphones.

"Oh very well done, Shikyou-sama," Nii called. Hazel's eyes narrowed at that, darting from side to side as he tensed.

"Amazing," Nii beamed. "Such progress the moment he gets to see you, Genjo. We must do this more often. Not too often, of course."

"If you think I'm going to help you in this madness..."

"But you don't have a choice," Nii said patiently. "And I think you've had enough excitement for the day." He waved at the guards. "Show Sanzo-sama to his rooms."

Sanzo went. There was nothing else he could do.

Back to index

Chapter 8: VIII

It was perhaps two days before he got to see Hazel again. There was no sense of time in the small room that they'd locked him in: no windows to look out of, no clocks, nothing but the occasional arrival of a silent youkai with a meal tray. Sanzo ate, waited, and tried in vain to formulate an escape plan. And fought nicotine deprivation.

Six meals later, the Gato-double showed up at his door, and Sanzo knew that something different was going to happen. When he was shown into the enclosure, he paused in surprise.

The place had been cleaned up. Most of the blood was gone, except for fresh marks on the floor where Hazel lay crumpled. Someone had evidentally tended to the man as well -- his flesh wounds were bandaged, the ones across his wings cleaned. There were fewer IVs.

"Good ahead," Nii told him over the speakers. "Say hello."

"He's not awake," Sanzo snapped.

"He is. He's just had a rough day."

Sanzo stepped forward apprehensively, noting the trickle of blood leaking out of Hazel's mouth. Rough day indeed. "Hazel."

Closed eyelids opened slowly, and Sanzo was relieved to see that the eyes that met his were only slightly red rimmed. He knelt by the bishop's side.

Hazel reached up to grab his hand, and Sanzo flinched before he noticed that the claws had been filed blunt. "You're here..."

"Yeah." He wasn't good at small talk. He normally left that to Hakkai. "Are you okay?" he asked in some concern, noting that the other wasn't even trying to pry himself off the floor. Hazel had lost weight, gone from too skinny to almost skeletal, and the tattered black shirt hung loosely off his frame. Hazel didn't reply. Sanzo scowled furiously up at the figure in a white labcoat who stood far above them, staring down. "What did you do to him?"

"Your concern betrays you, Genjo," Nii said mockingly. "Just trying new tactics. Starvation and dehydration are often an effective tools at keeping animals docile. It seems to work for this wild bird, at any rate."

Hazel smiled slightly. "Kill him for me, Sanzo-han."

"I will," Sanzo promised softly.

"But you'll notice he's almost completely sane now," Nii pointed out. "It seems as if the new medicine is working marvelously."

"Maybe he's just too tired to fight," Sanzo pointed out.

"Perhaps," Nii replied cheerfully. "Further tests will tell."

Hazel stiffened at those words, then his eyes fluttered shut in resignation. "Save yourself," he murmured. "Promise me you'll get away..."

"I'm blowing both of us out of here," Sanzo scowled.

"Such claims," Nii replied.

"Just shut up and get lost."

"Oh? Sanzo-sama wants privacy." Nii's smirk was almost audible. "I wonder what he intends to do."

Sanzo wanted to get someone to take his place, someone who was more suited to dealing with broken bishops, and let him get around to killing things and blowing this place sky high. He settled for examining the manacles, trying to find a way to pick them. They weren't magical. They were simple, solid iron.

Sanzo had melted the solid bars of Goku's cave, broken his chains with just a touch, but that was different...

He waited, wordless, by Hazel's side. Sentences came to mind, then withered away. The place was freezing cold, as was the metal floor. Too cold, too clean, too artifical... The cold seeped through Sanzo's robes to join the cold fist of dread in him.

Hazel fought when the shikigami came back, latching onto Sanzo's arm and refusing to let go. The Gato-double picked him up by the wings and pounded him into the ground until his grip gave and he didn't move again. All Sanzo's attempts to stop the shikigami got him was a backhand to the face, and a chuckle from Nii. He walked out feeling ill, and anger seething furiously in his heart.

"Where are the rest and what are you doing with them?" he demanded, when he was ushered into Nii's presence.

The scientist chewed on the end of his cigarette and smiled. "Oh. Nothing much at all. A little pre-experimentation passive monitoring."

Sanzo felt his nerves jangling as the smell of cigarette smoke drifted over to him. Damn bastard. "And Goku hasn't brought the house down yet? I'm surprised," Sanzo said, trying to ignore the nicotine deprivation that was rearing its ugly head. He could feel his fingers twitching.

"Oh, he's in no state to," Nii replied airily. "Now--"

"--what the fuck do you mean by that?!"

"Oh dear. Someone's protective. Sedatives, dear boy. Keeping unneeded test subjects in suspended animation is easier than risking them wracking havoc. Now stop asking so many questions. And observe."

The bastard enjoys performing for an audience, Sanzo thought bitterly, watching Nii fiddle with dials and controls. Lights flashed, falling from green to yellow and then to red. And having surrounded himself by shikigami and low-level youkai servitors, there's no one he can really show off to except me...

"The last time we did this, directly before he saw you, he flew off the handle completely," Nii said conversationally.

"Did what?"

"Oh, did I forget to mention?" a finger tapped a meter that was hovering just slightly over fifty. "The serum we've been using to simulate a chemical youryoku limiter. You saw him under a full dose just now. Now to see what happens when we halve it..."

Hazel thrashed violently against the shackles, wings beating uselessly at the air. The color of his irises warred between blue and red and blue and red, pupils contracted almost to pinpricks. Nii clicked his tongue.

"What were you expecting?" Sanzo asked. "You can't take a limiter off a youkai and expect him to be normal."

Nii shot him a sardonic smile, and hit a button his console.

There was the crackle of electricity. Sparks raced up and flew off the manacles as Hazel gave a strangled cry and crumpled. Sanzo forgot to breathe.

"Now, Your Reverence. Do pull yourself together. Your Sanzo-han is watching," Nii said.

There was silence for a long heartbeat, then Hazel slowly pushed himself to his hands and knees and stopped there. Tiny rivulets of sweat ran trickling down the sides of his face to fall off his chin, and his ragged breaths echoed over the speakers. Nii tapped a few more buttons, and nodded in approval.

"Much better. I'm impressed. So is Genjo."

"Leave him out of this," Hazel growled hoarsely.

Genuine surprise flashed across Nii's face. "I truly am impressed. I didn't expect to reach real conversation for another week at least."

Sanzo glanced between Nii and Hazel, a familiar feeling of helplessness welling up in him. If Nii hadn't lied to him, then any hope of escape lay in him alone. But with the Gato-double's heavy hand on one shoulder, and Hazel completely within Nii's power, there was just nothing he could do...

"Let's try taking you off the serum completely--"

"--stop it," Sanzo snapped. "You've pushed him far enough. Are you trying to kill him?"

"He doesn't have a human constitution. He can take it."

"I didn't mean his physical constitution, you asshole!"

Nii glanced around. "Oh, his mental health?"

Sanzo clamped his teeth on his lower lip.

Nii patted the bunny plushie. "That's precisely what we're concerned with, aren't we? And he's coping very well." His flicked a switch.

Sanzo closed his eyes.

By the time they returned him to his room, he was too shaken to eat. Hazel had exhibited a tiny flash of lucidity at the end, or so Nii had said, after repeated electric shocks had completely destroyed any semblance of resistence. For his part, Sanzo put it down to the fact that the bishop was too exhausted to move, inhuman strength or not.

Sanzo pounded his fist against the wall, trying to forget the sound of crackling electricity and agonized cries that ran on indefinite repeat through his memory. And if Nii succeeded... or even if he failed with Hazel, he would move on to Hakkai. Goku. Even the ero-kappa.

Somewhere, Sanzo could imagine, there were tanks ...

...one tank for every subject. Three in total. One had long hair, and Nii's assistants drew blood samples from him which they pondered over, while computers monitored heart rate, nutrient uptake and waste ouptut. Youki levels. Adrenaline. Cortisol. Various other chemicals with alien names, reduced to columns of numbers scrolling across the screen. At rest. Awake. Under stress. And again. And again. Until they decided that they had enough data to establish a pattern. As if they could unlock the ero kappa's very secrets in just a handful of days.

One they would not touch, not yet, content to simply, passively gather data. They would not dare even to wake him, not unless Nii was there, propping up his glasses and chewing on the end of his cigarette. Then they would venture to cut back on the sedatives, ever so cautious, terrified of waking the beast. And they would nudge him towards consciousness, leave him there, hovering on the brink, where his waking dreams reached out to Sanzo and sent a liturgy of infuriating calls down his spine: Helpme-rescueme-saveme, desperation tinted images of a cave, a mountain, a set of shackles, invading Sanzo's dreams, pestering him, driving him to the floor with his hands over his ears and curses on his lips.

Sanzo turned over, buried his head in his pillow, and tried to shut all images out of his mind.

*

A plan was almost a week in coming. Or perhaps it came earlier, but Sanzo ruthlessly suppressed it, searching desperately for an alternative. Too scared to even admit it as a solution to himself.

His nerve broke when they took him to see Hazel for the third time. They had lengthened his chains, Sanzo noticed, giving him enough leeway to sit up against a wall. His wings were starting to grow out again, but there was fresh blood where someone had pulled out the larger feathers. He was drenched in blood. It coated his hands, left dark streaks across his face and clothes, and clotted on the ends of his hair. A single IV ran from his arm to a pipe against the wall.

And his eyes were pure blue, and completely vacant.

Sanzo sank to his knees beside Hazel. The other sat motionless, resting his chin on a drawn up knee. His claws had grown, developed slight points, and no one had filed them this time.

"Hazel?"

"Sanzo-han." Hazel did not turn to look at him. Silvered bangs fell across his face, streaked with occasional white that had not been there before. His gaze fixed remained on the door at the far end of the room.

Nii himself appeared at Sanzo's shoulder. "He's almost good to be out in public again," the scientist said happily.

"What did you do to him?" Sanzo demanded.

"We seem to have developed an effective long-term version of the serum. We're down to daily doses with only the occasional fit. Of course, a lot of conditioning went into this." Nii reached down to ruffle Hazel's hair. Hazel flinched and drew away.

"Oh come now," Nii said. "I'm not that bad now, am I? And I let Genjo see you, just like I promised."

Sanzo found himself thinking of Kougaiji. Perhaps Nii had done the same to him, catching him when he was down and breaking him, then slowly building him up again. Perhaps the next time he saw Hazel, the man would be a ruthless killing machine answerable only to Nii. With that speed and the poisoned feathers, he would be more formidable than even a Gato shikigami.

"Now that he's fine, why don't you let him go?" Sanzo asked.

"Let him go?" Nii lit a cigarette. "That was never in the script."

"And I suppose you'll be working on Hakkai next."

"Oh yes. Son Goku's probably the bigger challenge, but after His Reverence here, he can hardly be tougher."

You have no idea, Sanzo thought, half-tempted to stand back and let Nii wander head first into that folly. But long before that happened, both Hazel and Hakkai would be as good as dead. Whatever that was left ... wouldn't be worth pegging an old identity to.

"So," Sanzo said, trying for conversational. "You work by suppressing the youkai side? Does that make the human side resurface?"

"That's the simple explanation, yes."

"Does that mean he's the same person he would be if he had a limiter?" Sanzo scanned Hazel's face for a response. There was none, although it seemed as if the circles under his eyes and the healing bruises grew just a tad darker.

"Theoretically," Nii said.

So perhaps underneath that blank exterior was the same sharp intellect that he knew the bishop possessed. Perhaps he was biding his time, under a guise of defeat. Perhaps this listless, lifeless behavior was simply all a show for Nii's benefit.

Sanzo wished that he was more convinced of that.

"Occasional fit, you said?"

"My, Genjo. I never thought you'd actually take an interest."

Sanzo shot Nii a scowl.

"We've succeeded in recreating events that will trigger a reversion 90% of the time. Would you like a demonstration?"

"No," Sanzo replied through clenched teeth. "Hazel?"

A brief sigh. "Please leave, Sanzo-han."

Sanzo could hear Nii scribbling in a notepad and humming tunelessly under his breath. "Stop fucking 'Sanzo-han'-ing me," he growled, trying for something, anything to elicit a response.

Hazel didn't even reply.

Shit. He stood in a swirl of robes, and still the bishop did not turn to look at him. Didn't react at all as he walked out, although Sanzo could feel his gaze burning into his back as he stepped out the door.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" Nii asked from beside him. "Like a work of art. Not quite complete, but very nearly there."

Sanzo could have throttled him.

*

By the time he was returned to his room, Sanzo realized that he had made up his mind. It was a stupid plan... in fact, it wasn't even a plan, just the barest beginning of an idea. He couldn't see where it could take him. He couldn't tell if it would even succeed. All he knew was that there would be no turning back. Ever.

Punching the wall didn't help. Hazel haunted his nightmares, and sometimes it was Hakkai, or Gojyo. Sometimes it was Goku, and Sanzo screamed his way out of those dreams.

He had to concede it, even to himself. Somewhere along the line, those few ... even the prat bishop, had become important enough to give a damn about. And he had very little to lose, besides a locked room with four walls and a delusion of hope.

So when the next youkai came delivering the meal tray, Sanzo tackled him. Kneed him in the gut and punched him in the jaw, then lunged forward to sink his teeth into the youkai's throat. He heard the pounding footsteps as reinforcements arrived, and spun to engage them. It was a brawl. Sanzo abandoned any pretence of his disciplined martial arts training and resorted to nails and teeth and occasionally, grabbing a youkai's arm and using its claws as a weapon.

They got the better of him, of course. Six, seven of them to his one. When the Gato-shikigami turned up, Sanzo was already on the ground, wheezing and not bothering to put up further resistance.

"Shit," a youkai spat, dislodging tooth that Sanzo had broken. "He's almost as vicious as the Bird."

"Yeah. Good thing he doesn't have claws."

Sanzo smiled to himself under the haze of pain. There was a great deal of it, but it normally took a great deal more to take him down. He was content to fake incapacity as the Gato-double hauled him upright, and sent him staggering down the corridor with a shove.

Almost. Almost, but not quite enough. He swiped surrepticiously at the smear of blood across his forearm, wincing unconsciously at the tingle it sent coursing through him.

-

"I can't think what possessed you to try that," Nii said. "Distress over the plight of your dear friends, perhaps?"

"In your dreams," Sanzo spat.

"I wouldn't advise you to try it again, of course. You might have no regard for yourself, but have a heart for your friends." Nii tapped the control panel meaningfully.

"What difference does it make? You beat him into a pulp on a regular basis anyway."

"How heartless you make me sound," Nii smiled. "I do nothing more than is strictly necessary. Of course, that could change, depending on your cooperation. Or lack thereof, shall I say?"

"I'll tell you again, I don't give a damn about him--"

"--shall we put that to the test?" Nii asked mildly.

"And undo the delicate balance that your experiments have created?"

"Genjo, Genjo. You'll never make a scientist. What use is an experiment if it's not repeatable? And in case there was any doubt as to whether I'd make good on my threats..."

"No--" the word blurted out even before Nii's finger could descend. Nii spared him a sardonic glance before clicking a button.

Nothing happened. Sanzo felt his breath leave him in gush, his relief so great that he didn't resist when Nii steered him over to the observation window.

"I wouldn't relax if I were you," Nii said beside his ear.

The door to the enclosure opened as the Gato-double stepped through. Sanzo felt his breath catch again. "You... sick bastard."

"Blow for blow, almost exactly the same as what you inflicted on my poor youkai guards," Nii said, sounding for all the world as if he were discussing the difference between . "With slight variations, of course, since Glosse fights differently..."

"I didn't do that," Sanzo said in sick fascination as the Gato-double grabbed Hazel by the neck and hurled him against the far wall.

"Slight variations, I did say. And some additions. And some artistic licence -- oh, that was pretty."

That in question was the brittle snap as the shikigami folded a wing backwards, breaking splint and healing bone. Hazel shrieked, his eyes a crazy battlefield of colors.

"He's fighting the madness," Nii noted, and Sanzo could swear he sounded smug. "Pain and hostility... two of the primary trigger factors. Let's see how this goes..."

Hazel opted for passivity. Sanzo watched him retreat as far as he could, going limp as the shikigami moved forward in preparation for another round.

"Stop," Nii ordered. "That's enough." He raised an eye at Sanzo. "You really do exert a positive effect on him."

"Then let me see him," Sanzo said, staring at the bloodied figure huddled against one wall. "Reward, right?"

"Maybe later," Nii said. "I need to send someone to assess the damage. And I do believe that Gato tore the IV out. How careless of him."

"This isn't experimentation anymore," Sanzo said, trying to keep the trembling rage out of his voice. Trying for as level a voice as possible, because any emotion gave this bastard a lever over him. "You do this for fun, don't you? With no one here to stop you and no one to answer to..."

"Work should be fun. Something you never learnt." Nii sounded amused.

"How could reducing him to this... ever be fun?!"

"Reducing him? Hardly. We're making progress in leaps and bounds here. Or did you not notice that none of the youkai around here wear limiters?"

Sanzo hadn't. "But most youkai don't need limiters, after Gyuumaou's fall."

Nii smiled. "And a good proportion of them are still raving mad without limiters. Glosse aside, those other two tagalongs of yours are cases in point. As are a good number of the youkai around here, by the way. I wouldn't advise you to antagonize them. Most of them don't have the control that Glosse has." His smile turned unpleasant. "And that was just a little reminder, Genjo. Do be a good boy in future. It might not be Glosse who takes the brunt of your rebellion in future. I do, after all, have three other lab rats to choose from."

Sanzo paid him no heed. In the back of his mind, he held to a single thread of hope like a lifeline.

Back to index

Chapter 9: IX

The world split. Sanzo found himself on the floor, the bedclothes still entangled around him. Minutes passed while he stayed there, breath coming too rapidly and sweat falling away from his forehead.

Why should I care, indeed? Just a dream. He sat up, kicking the blanket away.

--

The ensuing wait, the days that passed in that timeless room nearly drove Sanzo to distraction. The Gato-double delivered his meals now, and somehow Sanzo lost count of the hours, pacing back and forth and stewing.

"Let me see him," he demanded at last of the shikigami. The double simply raised an eyebrow and closed the door in his face. Sanzo flung a punch against the unyielding wood, and resumed his restless pacing.

But a few hours later, Nii sent for him.

"You wanted to see me?" the scientist asked, deliberately lighting a cigarette as Sanzo glared.

"Yeah. I wanted to see how the experiment was progressing."

"Oh, it hasn't been that long at all, but if you insist..." Nii gestured magnanimously at the glass.

"No, let me talk to him," Sanzo insisted.

"Ohh?" a skeptical raise of the eyebrow. A thoughtful tap of the cigarette end against an ashtray. "Well. Perhaps. Or perhaps not. What do you have planned, Genjo?"

Sanzo swallowed. "Damnit..." he schooled his expression, allowing the barest hint of suppressed worry to leak through. Then he spun. "Fine then. Not like I care. You and your bloody experiment can go to Hell."

Nii chuckled. "It helps if you ask nicely."

Sanzo spun back, clenching teeth and fists. "...Please."

Nii's eyes grew dark behind his spectacles. "He's too strong for you to kill, Genjo. Even in his current state."

"I wasn't planning on killing him." That much, at least, was true.

Nii studied for him for a long, long while. Finally he leaned back in his chair. "This should be interesting. Bring him down, Gato."

Not much had changed. There were fresh bandages and fresh splints, but no one had bothered to clean the dried blood off his skin. Deliberately leaving it, perhaps, as gruesome reminders. Hazel's eyes were closed when Sanzo approached. He was still slumped against the far wall, directly opposite the door, hands clasped around a drawn up knee and wings spanning listlessly to either side.

And Sanzo could just detect the lingering smell of coffee and cigarette smoke, as if someone had stood here, or sat here. For quite a while. Shreds of the dream came back to him, and made his stomach twist.

"Hazel." Sanzo reached out to shake him by the shoulder. He had to resist the urge to unbutton Hazel's shirt to check for the presence of barcodes.

The bishop's eyes flickered open, glanced at Sanzo, and returned to staring at his feet.

"Hazel. Look at me."

"What are you doing here, Sanzo-han?" His voice was almost inaudible, scratched and hoarse.

"Getting you out of here."

"It's impossible..."

Sanzo grabbed him by the chin and stared into wide blue eyes. "Nothing is impossible, by the grace of your God, isn't that so?" Live. Breathe. Hope. I need your help.

Hazel smiled weakly. "Don't lecture me about my faith, Sanzo-han." Not here. Not now.

"I damn well will if you're not going to pull yourself together. Dying doesn't solve anything. And martyrdom is overrated." He dropped his voice. "Sorry about this in advance."

"What abou--"

Sanzo kissed him. Lips and teeth and tongue, as if trying to pour his own spirit and will and life into the man. He kept eyes open long enough to see the surprise flood onto Hazel's face, then brought his teeth down on Hazel's lower lip hard enough to break scabs and draw blood.

And the world changed for Genjo Sanzo.

He screamed, for it blazed, a white inferno that overwhelmed him completely. He screamed at the red wash that coated his vision, at the claws that ripped out of nailed finger tips, the fangs that scored his lip and sent the acrid taste of his own blood trickling down his throat.

He came back to himself as he snapped the chains that bound Hazel, as if they were just skinny twigs. Drunk on pain and madness and power. Reeling. Let the world white out again as he fought desperately for control. There was a voice, tinny and distant, over something he remembered was called a speaker. He tried to focus, tried to battle the waves of bloodlust.

He recalled like a weapon the long chants that he'd been forced to memorize as a child, running them through his mind and drawing stability from their familiar monotony. Clarity returned, like sweeping up splinters of silvered glass with his bare hands. Fragmented and painful and too reflective. He found himself moving, tearing apart the mechanism that kept the door closed. White walls swallowed him then, and he moved, or the world moved, falling past him in the slow rhythm of a dream.

There was a man before him, in white, and he could not see his eyes. The man spoke, words tumbling from his lips. Half familiar. Half forgotten. There was a power building here, he could feel it trembling in his nerves, making his hairs stand, and he drew back his lips in feral grin. Some warning tried to make itself known in the haze at the back of his mind, a tickle that rose and fell and faded too quickly for him to pay heed to.

He darted forward, and suddenly the word was full of green and white, and it burned, searing fingers that caught his flesh and--

--and fell away, retracting, and--

--the man in white was falling, the life gone from him, and behind him was a man in black. The world twisted, too sharp, too focused, and he could not see. He could smell, though, the tang of blood sharp on the air. He inhaled deeply, letting it pool in his stomach, letting the flare of adrenaline sweep away the residue whispers of pain. The one in front of him had deprived him of his kill, but no matter. It had presented itself as a target and he could scent the blood on it, hear its ragged breaths. It was wounded. Easy prey.

Light flashed off something gold as it stooped. And looked away from him.

He lunged.

Claws impacted on air, and there was a chime as a length of metal whipped past his face. He caught it, wrenched, and the other staggered, crashing into him. Silver against his chest, silver and white, and so much red. He grabbed at strands of hair, pulling its head back and aiming claws at its throat. For a moment his vision focused around a pair of blue eyes staring at him in horror, then with a wrench his prey tore itself out of his grasp and retreated, leaving him with a handful of bloodied strands.

He smiled, sensing the fear and confusion that radiated off it. It was too slow, and the space too confined for it to use its wings. He circled as it staggered backwards, savoring its terror. It backed into a corner and he advanced, nerves tingling with anticipation, claws itching to bury themselves in flesh and rend it. He paused, feeling the muscles of his face twist into a smile. And struck.

It was faster than he had expected. It dived out of his way, and he only managed to tear a few lines down its shoulder. It dived past him, headed towards its earlier kill. He turned to watch, seeing it crouch by the fallen man's side. Strange behavior, but perhaps it had recognized that it could not flee. He leapt, a single bound that took him across the room, striking downwards.

Something intercepted him in mid-fall, a thud to the stomach that knocked his angle awry and sent him crashing to the ground. He sprung up, fully intending to go for the kill--

--a hand grabbed his robe and jerked him forward--

--Weight around his neck.

Blinding gold.

Seared into white.

Faded to black.

Sanzo opened his eyes. He was on the floor, and Hazel was leaning over him, concern written on his face.

"What... the hell..." He ached, every muscle thoroughly strained. His head hurt too, eyes fuzzily overcompensating for the light and the world generally refusing to resolve into a straight, level plane.

Hazel said nothing, but the concern faded from his eyes to be replaced by weary fatigue. He slumped backwards, out of Sanzo's field of vision.

That wasn't good. Summoning all of his willpower, Sanzo levered himself upright. Something clinked against his chest, gold and altogether too familiar, and not something he'd ever expected to end up carrying, himself. Oh irony, thy name is 'Sanzo'.

"You did this?" he asked, gesturing at the pendant limiter.

"Yes. You left me very little choice."

"I--" he frowned. "I tried to kill you, didn't I?"

Hazel's silence was affirmation enough.

"Fuck. Where's Nii?"

A small gesture to the side. Sanzo turned and beheld a corpse, its neck twisted at an impossible angle, its throat neatly slit. He glanced back at Hazel, as shreds of recent memory came pouring back. Hazel. It had been Hazel behind Nii, snapping his neck even whilst the scientist turned the power of the Maten Kyoumon on Sanzo himself.

"Revenge is sweet," he mumbled.

"No," Hazel replied softly. "It isn't." The cuff around his wrist clanked as he brushed his hair out of his eyes.

"Whatever. Thank me later," Sanzo considered and discarded the notion of rooting through Nii's pockets for cigarettes. "We need to find the rest before the whole place descend--" He flung himself out of the way of the bullets that whistled past, reflexes in human form still far superior to whatever he'd possessed before. He whirled, coming face to face with the Gato-double that had appeared. Instinctively fell into a fighting crouch. Spared half second to glance at his companion-- "Shit."

Hazel was just standing there, staring down the two massive revolvers leveled at him, eyes wide and fists curled. Still unable to believe that the figure standing before him wasn't Gato. Still unable to retaliate or even get his wussy ass out of the way--

Sanzo heard the roar of the guns, and flung himself in Hazel's direction, only Hazel wasn't there any more. As the lethal projectiles whizzed past Sanzo's face, he saw a flash of white and black dart at the shikigami and grab it by the wrists.

"That's not Gato, you ass!"

Not that Hazel was listening. No, the idiot was standing there trying to reason with the shikigami. It was tragic. It was pathetic. Sanzo didn't have time for pathetic. He didn't even have--

--too late. A knee came up, an arm flicked, and Hazel went flying backwards, crashing into the wall. Sanzo swore and dived in front of the Gato-double, swearing again as he took the bullet intended for Hazel in the shoulder. He plowed a useless fist into the shikigami's chin and tried to disarm him--

Then he was flying backwards, seeing the world streak by before it met his back entirely too suddenly and too painfully.

He ripped off the pendant as he rolled, not pausing to think how the two bullets that thudded behind him had been, and flung himself at the shikigami.

And Sanzo opened his eyes, to find that he was bleeding in entirely too many places. The amulet was clenched between his bloodstained fingers, although he frankly couldn't tell how he'd found the presence of mind to get it. Perhaps Hazel had shoved it into his hand again. Perhaps he, like Hakkai, had some enough self control to pick up his limiter after he'd taken it off.

Well, there would be lots of time to get used to this youkai shit later. If he survived. If the world would stop strobing in mad colors and lights, and if he could just gather the shreds of his concentration together to assess the damage...

Two bullets had gone through his left arm, clean shots that went in and exited the other end. Another through the shoulder, still lodged in the bone, and one in his torso. He'd definitely have to get Hakkai to look at that one, preferably within the hour. In the meantime, he just needed to persuade himself to move, and check if the shikigami was as dead -- well, fine, defeated -- as he hazily remembered it being. Surely it couldn't fight with its head gone.

He flopped over again instead. "Oi. Hazel. You alive over there?"

"Unless this is Hell, I suppose so."

"Last I checked, we weren't that lucky. Could you sort out the rest of this mess for me? I'd like to die in peace."

A dry rasp that might have been a chuckle. "I would if I could stand."

"Useless wimp."

"You should finish what you start, Sanzo-han."

"Don’t fucking Sanzo-han me. I'm dying here." He closed his eyes to prove his point, curling around the explosive pain in his gut. Lights danced across the inside of his closed lids, driving spears of pain into his skull.

"Dying doesn't solve anything, Sanzo-han." There was a scrape, and a metallic clink.

"Don't you start lecturing me, asshole."

"Being a youkai doesn't change you at all, does it?" A hand worked its way under his undamaged shoulder. "Some help, if you please? I'm not strong enough to carry you."

Sanzo groaned. "Trust me to have to do everything myself." He wrestled himself into a sitting position, mentally screaming at the pain and the nausea. "You're strong enough to break necks. You're strong enough to limp your way down that corridor and find the other three morons."

Hazel might have smiled. "Adrenaline is a wonderful thing, but it's gone now. If you don't stand right now, I'm going to collapse on you. Sanzo-han."

In the end he did collapse, albeit against the opposite wall. Sanzo spent a moment of his precious concentration to wonder why there were no hordes of attacking youkai yet. He dismissed it as unimportant. Perhaps they'd grown brain cells and learnt to fear for their lives. It seemed most prudent, most important, to let his eyes drift close again, too tired to care, or move. Someone had taken a sledgehammer to his head, and was driving nine inch nails into it. That was fine. What was not fine was that he was dying without a last cigarette, without a last beer, and that had to suck.

*

"Really," a familiar voice said. "You're supposed to be the knight errant and save the day. Knight errants don't fall asleep on the job."

Sanzo cracked an eyelid open. It took him a whole three seconds to realize that the pain was gone. It took him another two seconds to recognize Hakkai. His hair was messed and ruffled, as if he had just taken a shower and hastily toweled it dry, and he seemed to have discarded his usual attire for a loose white hospital gown.

"The fuck?"

"Good morning," Hakkai said cheerfully.

"It's not good fucking morning! How did you get here?"

"I wouldn't know. I didn't take note of the passing of the days." Hakkai smiled as if he'd just woken up to find that it was spring and the sun was shining and there was enough coffee to feed a legion on the table. "Hazel-san was kind enough to pull himself together and wander through half the complex looking for us. It's a good thing he didn't have to fight much -- most of the youkai fled when he flexed his claws. It's also a very good thing he found me first."

"Yeah. How is he?"

"Closer to death than you are, actually." Hakkai sounded mildly reproving. Coming from someone who had cheerfully collapsed in the rain and let Gojyo do all the work after he'd turned youkai and taken a gut wound...

"Find me a limiter," Sanzo said. "There must be one around here. And give the damn pendant back to him."

"We'll do that later. His constitution can't take a return to human form at the moment."

"The last I checked it wasn't anything serious. He just had a few broken bones and hadn't eaten for a week. Or something."

"Aside from the wounds that you seem to have inflicted on him? There's also the stress he's been under. Oh, and internal injuries. The latter two I can't do anything about, unfortunately. And we still have to get out of here, preferably with Goku and Gojyo."

"You haven't found the morons?" Sanzo demanded, sitting up straight. "Good. Leave them. We'll come back and get them in a week's time. Or a month's. Or a year."

"Maybe I should just leave you here," Hakkai offered brightly.

"Fuck you."

"Maybe later."

Before Sanzo could demand to know just what Hakkai meant by that, the man was already turning and striding away. There was a chuckle from nearby.

"What's so funny?" Sanzo demanded.

"Nothing. Just that, the sooner you move, the sooner there will be beer. And cigarettes," Hazel replied.

Well, that got him moving. Sanzo levered himself off the ground, grabbing the railing to pull himself to his feet, swaying uncertainly. The world, damn it, pitched violently. "Just where did you find the pendant, anyway?"

"It was around Dr Nii's neck," Hazel answered. "I couldn't find your revolver, but there are two sutras. One might be yours."

The one he remembered exploding towards in him. Sympathetic fear twisted belatedly in his stomach. He limped over to the table that Hazel was seated -- slumped -- at, to where two scrolls lay innocuously on the metal surface.

His hand hovered uncertainly over them, recalling scorchingheatwhitepain. His nerves tingled at the proximity, and he couldn't tell if it was from a real or imagined power. They were dormant, and they were not supposed to hurt a youkai in this state. And still he hesitated.

Hazel opened an eye and glanced up from where he was dozing on folded arms. "They're fine. I handled them."

"You're not a youkai," Sanzo snapped, and grabbed the sutras, embarrassed. He settled the Maten back around his shoulders, wishing that it didn't feel subtly different, as if it didn't quite belong there any more. The Muten he stuffed into a pocket.

"Youkai enough to turn you into one," Hazel replied drowsily. "And did you really mean that kiss--"

"--No," Sanzo snapped, turning away just on the off-chance that the heat in his cheeks was showing visibly. "It was just a convenient way of getting your attention and blood."

"We must discuss that at length some time," Hazel replied.

"Are you going to move?"

"Now that you mention it... no, I don't think so. You go ahead. I'll catch up with you."

Sanzo had been around Hakkai on rainy days long enough to know that a smile and a light tone could mean absolutely nothing at all. Suppressing a grimace and muttering about weak minded fools, he spun, got an arm under Hazel's, and tugged the bishop to his feet.

Hazel's knees gave way after two steps. "I apologize for th--"

"Shut up," Sanzo snarled, flinging Hazel's arm around his shoulder. The damn manacles were heavy, probably weighed more than the bishop did at this time. "Shut up and walk."

Hazel did just that, thank the gods for minor miracles. Sanzo felt a concern that he wouldn't admit aloud to at the other's faltering footsteps, at the way his breath came too fast and too shallow, at the chill of his flesh that just never seemed to go away. He wished that Nii were still alive. He wanted to wring the scrawny bastard's neck himself... or possibly devise a more painful and lasting death. A broken neck was ... "Just too kind," he muttered.

"What was that?" Hazel asked faintly.

"Nothing. Just don't expect me to do this again for you. Ever."

"I am in your debt."

"Then stay alive long enough to pay it off."

Hakkai intercepted them at that point, and for the first time Sanzo noticed how tired he looked.

"I found them. And Jiipu. Who is in no condition to transform and drive anywhere, unfortunately."

"What did Nii do to him?"

Hakkai's lips were pressed into a thin line. "Experimented, probably. He is fine, just exhausted. ...You're sure that Nii is dead?"

"Quite sure," Sanzo replied. "And I have first dibs on him if he isn't."

"I wonder," Hazel murmured. "He always seemed so unkillable."

"He was human. Same as us-- same as what we used to be." Well, damn. This will take some getting used to. "He's dead. I'm sure of that. Hell, you ripped out his throat. You ought to be sure of that."

"And Gato?" Hakkai asked.

Sanzo could just recall his claws searing through that chalky material that shikigami seemed to be made off. Separating limb from limb and head from body, the grains falling through his fingers thud heavily to the floor. "Shikigami are already dead. But he won't be bothering us."

"Good." Hakkai took aim and blew a door apart. "And I believe this is Gojyo..."

Sanzo glanced in. A tank dominated the room, eerily reminiscent of the wrecked ones they had seen back in the basement of Houtou castle. Green liquid moved lazily within, enfolding tubes and wires that led down to an indistinct shape floating in the middle. Long limbed, long haired... while it was impossible to tell through the green what color hair was, the hazy silhouette certainly could not have belonged to Goku.

"You were in a tank as well," Sanzo observed to Hakkai.

"I was, although I wasn't particularly aware of it. Suspended animation does that to people. Hazel-san gave me quite the awakening when he smashed the tank open and ripped out the support systems."

Hazel smiled tiredly. "I apologize."

"No harm done, fortunately. But I do believe there's a less disruptive, if somewhat slower way--"

A stray thought that had been idly nagging at the back of Sanzo's mind finally came forward, now that the mental haze seemed to be receding. He waited for a few seconds, watching Hakkai fiddle with the dials, then straightened. "Find Goku and meet me at the entrance. I have some things to do."

Hazel glanced quizzically at him as Sanzo guided him over to the wall and peeled his arm off his shoulders. "You can use Hakkai as a prop. Or the ero-kappa. He's used to it."

"What kind of business could you possibly have here? You have the sutras, after all."

Sanzo fiddled with the amulet limiter. "Don't ask so many bloody questions."

*

He stepped purposefully out of the room after that, heading back to the observation deck. A deck, an enclosure, and with any hope, Nii's laboratory itself. The lights flickered as he passed, possibly a surge caused by Hakkai's tinkering... or the generators were going. It was deathly silent, empty of any living beings, and his own breath seemed to scratch and echo too loudly in the deserted corridors.

His nerves prickled as he stepped into the observation deck, and he glanced sharply at the two corpses on the floor, half expecting them to be gone--

--they were there, one dead human and one ruined shikigami. Something loosened in his chest as he stepped over the Gato double's motionless form, as he mentally chastised himself for childish fears.

And then he stopped, and very slowly, turned back to look at Nii's corpse.

...and there was no blood leaking from the wound at all.

-x-

Back to index

Chapter 10: X

Seconds passed, turning into a minute, or two. Very slowly, Sanzo unfroze, glancing from corpse to room and studying the area. Even more slowly, he repressed the sudden surge of mindless terror, and carefully knelt to examine the body.

His fingers pressed on the edge of the wound, and flesh crumbled to dusty chalk. A shikigami, but one that had actually been carrying the sutras. Perhaps a decoy, perhaps a clone...

...or perhaps there had never been a real Nii, and this shikigami had been the scientist that had been manipulating things from the shadows--

--No. There had been a Nii, or an Ukoku Sanzo at least, once upon a time. He was sure of that. And no shikigami, no matter how well made, could survive without a controller. The real Nii had to be around somewhere, watching, taking notes, and chuckling to himself. Sanzo somehow doubted that he would run across the man again, not in the flesh, not until he had retreated, rebuilt and hatched another plan.

Sanzo glanced down at the maten sutra around his shoulders. The Maten, Muten, and Seiten... and two lost. Perhaps Nii had them. Perhaps peace in Tougenkyou was still far away.

For the briefest of moments he allowed himself to fall to the urge of anger, frustration, bitterness How long how much more how many more lives. For a moment he allowed himself to rail at the Heavens, digging blunted nails into the amulet around his neck, swept up in the unfairness of it all what more do you want from me, wanting to cave to the darkness in the back of his mind, the howling bloodlust that made his grip tighten around the limiter and want to pull it off--

He forced himself to put it aside, to calm down, to move, continuing his search for the laboratory. Either Nii would confront him somewhere, or was already far away. Sanzo rather felt that it was the latter, even if it was wistful thinking... the man wasn't interested in fighting for its own sake and there wasn't much left to salvage from this operation. In fact, there wasn't much to lose: Nii's work had almost been complete, his data collected, his research finalized. Nii would go to ground, Sanzo decided, and emerge again when he was least expected or welcomed.

His wandering footsteps had brought him through a series of doors labelled with bright yellow danger labels. He emerged at last in a room dotted with long benches and sinks, jars of reagents neatly lined up on shelves. One whole section had been noticeably cleaned out, and if the broken bottles on the floor were any indicator, someone had left in a hurry. The fridges were empty. Annoyed, Sanzo made a round of the laboratory, carefully inspecting the leftovers, and idly wondering what they were. If Yaone were here she would likely know.

In the absence of any threat, his nerves slowly unwound, and Sanzo began noticing the changes. The way his vision became sharper, the slight haze on objects that he had once required spectacles to correct.. was gone. Hearing too, had grown more acute, and continued to do so. And the smells... he winced. A laboratory was not the best place to realize that your nose had suddenly become much better.

The glow from a small incandescent bulb caught his eye. He turned, noticing a glass box tucked away into the corner of the room. A bottle sat in it, beside several syringes, and there was a small slip of paper.

Genjo Sanzo, it read, written in an untidy scrawl.

Best regards, and do look after yourself until we meet again. Transforming from human to youkai can be such a traumatic experience.

The paper crumpled in his hand as Sanzo clenched his fist. He stared at the jar in front of him, sitting innocuously in its little puddle of light.

When he finally turned to leave the lab, the bottle was a heavy weight in his pocket.

*

He rejoined the rest under the clearest blue sky he had seen in a long time. Goku was complaining about hunger. Gojyo was complaining about Goku complaining. Hakkai was fussing over Jiipu. And Hazel...

Not entirely accurate, but there was enough of a grain of truth in that to sting.

But I don't save anyone. Sanzo stared at the foreigner, bloodied and battered, eyes closed and face raised to Heaven. Praying to his God? Thinking? Or just reveling in the sunlight that he hadn't seen in a while?

"SANZO!" Goku yelled as soon as he stepped out of the building. "You're okay!" And then the boy was in front of him, staring at him with a quizzical look and wrinkling his nose-- "Sanzo? You smell like a youkai."

"We go," Sanzo barked, as Gojyo turned to stare.

"You're wearing Hazel's amulet!" Goku pointed out. "What happened?"

Sanzo scowled. "Go figure it out yourself."

"The high and mighty Sanzo-sama--" Gojyo was cut off when Hakkai politely but firmly foisted Jiipu onto him. "We must get going," he pointed out.

"Can he walk?" Sanzo asked.

"With help." Hakkai didn't need to inquire as to whom Sanzo had been referring to. He moved to Hazel's side, offering an arm. "We have a long way to go."

Something in those words made Sanzo bite his lip.

*

They crashed at the first inn they reached, in a routine all too reminiscent of their journey. Exhaustion had caught up with Sanzo on the road, dragging him down until he thought that there was no way he could make it up the stairs. Sheer stubbornness alone got him to the room before he hit the pillow and let the world vanish.

He slept fitfully, dreaming of shikigami that exploded into dust and rebuilt themselves. He dreamt of shifting darkness, of quiet whisperings. He dreamt of Nii Jieni in a Sanzo's robe, and the doctor held the five sutras in his hands.

He awoke to evening light, golden and orange and far brighter than it should ever had been for this time of the day. He squinted against the glare, cursing the inconsiderate asshole who had forgotten to draw the curtains–

"–The curtains are drawn," someone chuckled.

Sanzo glanced over in irritation. His eyes gradually focused on Hakkai, seated in the chair with a book open in his lap.

"Good evening," the other greeted him cheerfully. "It’ll take a bit of getting used to, believe me."

"You should know," he grumbled, sniffing. Hell, he could smell the wood, the bloody dust, and the faintest trace of blood…

"How is he?"

"Hazel, you mean?" Hakkai asked. "Sleeping. There’s very little we can do for him in the way of healing or treatment. He just needs time to recover his strength. After that…" Hakkai’s glance met Sanzo’s briefly, before both of them looked away.

"After that can wait," Sanzo announced.

"I suppose it can," Hakkai agreed hesitantly. He paused, his smile draining away.

"What is it?"

"And how are you?" The question posed almost deferentially, as if dealing with some invalid who couldn’t look after himself…

"I’m fine." It came out a snap, tinged with irritation. As if he’d let something like changing into… into a youkai… take him down. He’d get a limiter, and that would be the end of the matter. The Sanbutsushin could go and throw a hissy fit for all he cared. It was their damned fault that he had set out on the Journey anyway and gotten into the bloodbath that was the youkai slaughter on the way.

"I hated youkai," Hakkai mused. "Hated them even more when I came to terms with what I’d become."

Sanzo searched irritably for a cigarette. "So? Sudden revelation when you realized what you’d become? Realized that they weren’t so bad after all?"

A low laugh. "Oh, they were just as terrible as I imagined. Merciless, heartless." The faint smile was playing around the corners of Hakkai’s lips. "Perhaps it’s because they have liberty to gather and exert the power that nature gave to them. The liberty to unleash the darkness within us all. Humans, on the other hand, have simply learnt to restrain it, to strangle it into the darkest corner of their hearts and avoid it like plague."

"Humans can be bastards too," Sanzo agreed moodily. He couldn’t find the cigarettes.

"I suppose it doesn’t really matter what species you are. Or perhaps it does, because that would affect the environment you were brought up with, and hence the values you grew up with." Hakkai paused. "I wonder what would have happened if Hazel had not met that monster."

Sanzo shrugged. "Pointless speculation."

Hakkai toyed with the pages of the book. "If we say that species does not matter, then why do you and I still go out of control without our limiters? Is it to say that our human sides inhibit impulses that our youkai sides do not? That we really are irrational killers restrained by a veneer of civilization?"

He wanted to end this discussion. Let Hakkai go and inflict his philosophy upon someone else and just shut up. "We’re all bastards. Live with it."

"I think not." The book snapped shut with a clap that made Sanzo jump. "I think that, given the choice, none of us would actually kill someone else. Not for the fun of it. Not for the impulse. There must be something else to this." There was a shrill chime as he flicked his finger against something. Piercing clang that broke the silence. Sanzo glanced over sharply, and saw that it was the jar that he had taken from Nii’s laboratory.

"Doctor Nii isn’t dead, is he?" Hakkai said quietly.

Sanzo shrugged, threads spiraling together in his mind. Mad youkai had been a feature for so long that he’d come to take it for granted. Goku had never been particular sane without his limiter–

--image of a kid’s tear stained facing staring up at him "I thought you’d left me I thought you’d abandoned me"–

Someone rapped on the door. "Cho-san?"

Hakkai called an acknowledgement, and smiled brightly when someone — the innkeeper, Sanzo guessed — opened the door and glanced in.

"The locksmith is here."

"Oh!" Hakkai deposited the book on the bedside table. "I’ll be right there." He glanced over. "Join me, Sanzo?"

Sanzo was already shoving the covers away. "What on earth did you call a locksmith for–"

Hakkai was already leaving the room. Sanzo fumbled for his robe and dashed after him.

*

It was like the time he’d gotten someone to attend to Goku, just after he’d released him from that mountain. Except that Goku had shown a lively interest in the locks and the lockpicking tools, poking at each of them and demanding to know what they were for. And that had been a simpler affair, with the early morning sun peaking through the window and the kid’s high pitched voice coloring the air with good cheer.

Now the locksmith looked up in grimly from his work, squinting in the candlelight that warded the encroaching darkness of night away. And shook his head. "The locks are rusted shut with something–"

"–Blood," Hazel supplied, almost brusque in his obvious weariness. The locksmith glanced uncomfortably away from him, to avoid staring at the wings that hung in the shadows, imposing and terrifying.

"At any rate, I can’t pick them. I’ll have to break them."

"Whatever is necessary," Hakkai said.

You released him from the mountain, the Sanbutsushin’s voices resounded in his memory: He is your responsibility now.

And again: You interceded on his behalf. He is your responsibility now.

Sanzo stared through narrowed eyes as the smith set to heating and hammering the cuff round Hazel’s left wrist. I will not take responsibility for you. For anyone.

Naturally, a cynical voice said in the back of his mind. You have problems enough looking after yourself.

Sanzo could feel the amulet pressing heavily against his chest under his robe.

Hakkai looked up when he pushed himself away from the doorframe, announcing the need for a cigarette and a drink. Hazel never glanced his way, gazing off into the shadows of the room. Lost in his own thoughts, whatever they were.

"Get dinner," Hakkai called after him. "You need to eat, and so do Gojyo and Goku."

Sanzo grunted in response and allowed the door to swing shut behind him.

*

"You sure you’re okay?" Goku asked between mouthfuls. "I mean, can’t be easy, right? Becoming a youkai ‘of a sudden."

There was one problem, certainly. The cigarettes tasted like shit to his enhanced senses of smell and taste. Sanzo stared balefully at the pack of Marlboros.

"Lost your touch?" Gojyo asked, cheerfully lighting up. If his cigarettes had smelt bad before, now they smelt infinitely worse. Like joss sticks gone wrong in the worst possible way. Sanzo shoved his chair back.

"Could be cos you haven’t smoked all that time," Goku supplied cheerfully.

"Hell no," Sanzo snorted, attempting another drag on his cigarette and promptly gagging on the smoke.

"Lightweight," Gojyo smirked.

"Shut the fuck up," Sanzo coughed.

"It’s probably for the best," a new voice called from the doorway.

"Hakkai!" Goku called out, waving. "Jiipu was up earlier and he was starving. But he’s sleeping again. Bet he’ll grow fat like this."

"All you ever do is eat and sleep, monkey. You should be worried about your own waistline," Gojyo said.

"I’ll never grow fat," Goku said with the certainty of a twenty one year old with just about the highest metabolic rate in the country. "But we saved you some dumplings, Hakkai! Although if you don’t want them…" he trailed off, looking hopeful.

A cheerful laugh, as Hakkai pulled out a chair and sat. "You can have them. I ate earlier." He reached over and abducted Sanzo’s pack of Marlboros. "This is a wonderful opportunity to quit. You’ll thank me for it later in life."

"Steal the kappa’s cigarettes, why don’t you?" Sanzo snarled, grabbing for the pack that Hakkai held out of reach.

"Now, Sanzo. We’re not talking about Gojyo. We’re talking about you." He smiled. "Gojyo’s turn will come."

It was beneath his dignity to scramble over Hakkai in an attempt to get his cigarettes back, so Sanzo opted for his favorite tactic of changing the topic to avoid looking as if he’d been bested. "The locksmith is done?"

"Done," Hakkai confirmed. He poured himself some tea.

"And Jiipu?"

"Jiipu will be fit to travel in a day or two, I think. I took the liberty of dispatching a message to Chou’An Ji to let them know that we are fine."

Gojyo snorted. "’Fine’ is the perhaps the understatement of the year." He stretched, yawning hugely. "I could sleep for a week."

"You were sleeping for a week," Hakkai replied. "But we’re all alive, which counts for something, does it not?"

Goku opened his mouth to reply, then stopped short abruptly. He looked up, sniffing the air, a frown creasing his forehead. "Sanzo–"

But Sanzo could smell it for himself now. With a muffled curse, he shoved the chair back, not caring that it toppled over and hit the floor with a resounding crash. He dashed out of the dining room and headed for the stairs, taking them two at a time.

In his nose burned the acrid, distinctive odor of blood.

--x--

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