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Reviewer: AeryonSun Signed Date: 03/22/09 - 07:18PM Title: Chapter 7

Beautiful. I really wish my vocabulary could offer up more than that, but for fear of sounding cheesy, or worse, confusing I will leave it with this: Beautiful, just beautiful.

Reviewer: Ditch Gospel Signed Date: 05/27/08 - 10:48PM Title: Chapter 7

Aww... Congrats on the update! It has been a while and it's quite an accomplishment to come back to a WIP that's been hanging for far longer than anyone would like. :)

This chapter manages to be romantic without getting mushy, and I think it's the intensity that let's it keep its edge, that last bit of tension from past events that kind of melts away with the heat, the tears, and Hakkai's gentle yet unshaking control and act of pessession. I'm looking forward to the final update!

Reviewer: Emerald Anonymous Date: 02/09/08 - 01:00PM Title: Chapter 1

I read this story while ago an then I lost it, couldn't find it again, and oh, that was terrible!

But now I've found it again. It's my favourite. Me happy!

Reviewer: Sanada Anonymous Date: 03/22/07 - 09:06PM Title: Chapter 5

I absolutely LOVE this trilogy. You are an incredibly talented writer. You have portrayed the characters quite well, even if it was some times different from their normal selves. Since I loved it so much a really read it and noticed something that seemed a bit wrong. You had Hakkai injure Gojyo’s chest…..

With it came the sensation of Gojyo's skin, warm under his fingers. Warm...and wet.

Before Gojyo could stop him, Hakkai's eyes darted down to where his fingers lay against Gojyo's flesh. Ten tiny crescents marred the sun-browned skin. Thick red fluid welled out of each, bowing outward briefly before falling to run in rivulets around his fingertips and down Gojyo's torso.

Then you allowed Hakkai to find comfort with Gojyo by resting on the injured chest……

Hakkai silently laid his head on Gojyo's chest, and Gojyo wrapped his arm around Hakkai's shoulder, pulling him close.

I don’t think Hakkai could have rested against the flesh he had damaged. I realize that they were small wounds, but they bled enough to run in rivulets. I would have thought that he would have healed them.

Just a thought.

I hope you write more, because I will definitely read your work!

Author's Response: You are so crazy nice to me!  Thank you for the encouragement.  I know that I portray the boys as somewhat different, sometimes, but i can't help but feel that they really must have more happening inside than they normally let out (I can't help wanting to see it, though).  I was going to have Hakkai heal Gojyo, but as it turned, out, he didn't.  I think that the reason why (since I write this story in a near trance, frankly), is because Hakkai knows that Gojyo is wanting to feel the pain, etc.  And he's hating himself enough to deal with looking at and feeling what he has done.  It will be discussed, etc, in the next chapter, which I am currently writing.  Thank you for pointing it out for me.  I appreciate that you do those things. ^_^ (Not that I'd miss posting a whole chapter, or anything...)

Reviewer: 7veilsphaedra Anonymous Date: 03/17/07 - 06:00PM Title: Chapter 1

Hi A'mael! I can't believe I missed this one. You certainly have a way with explosive beginnings. The first chapter was so intense and effective. The reactions between the two felt so very real, from Gojyo's clumsy flounderings to Hakkai's tight, armored, constricted self-control. Gojyo's impulsive folly chimes perfectly in the next chapters.

The fourth chapter was so intense and traumatic, I had a hard time sticking to the story. The wavering between human-Hakkai and youkai-Hakkai seemed to induce a similar wobbley in my focus. Well, a good story makes a reader experience inwardly what the characters experience in that imaginary dimension, so I guess that's a good sign. Except it did make me want to go eat some comfort food.

As for the last chapter, there is quite a lot of symbolism in the touches and the warm shower, given the reactions to rain. It did feel cleansing. The scene with Sanzo didn't do anything for me, though. It felt like a literal interruption in the flow of the story, although it emphasized the chaotic out-of-the-blue aspects of their journey, I suppose. 

What I particularly liked about this last chapter, is how you managed to put the finger on something very subtle about Gojyo. A lot of writers, myself included, depict him as a very happy-go-lucky idiot who is actually very caring and nurturing underneath the fooling around. But, no, he isn't *quite* that way at all, is he? Yes, Gojyo has as much of a nurturing, healing side as Hakkai, but it seems to come out only in wild bursts through utter catastrophe, (BURIAL SPOILERS) where he scoops up the half-dead Cho Gonou, or where he agrees to be the hostage for Banri in order to keep the youkai from attacking Hakkai at their home, for example. The rest of the time, he's a selfish, self-indulgent bastard.  I really enjoy how you have created a definitive moment of regret, a turning point for his consciousness.

So, all in all, excellent work! Thanks for putting yourself through the effort of writing this for us.  

Author's Response: Thanks for the awesome review, Phae!  I understand what you mean about hte Sanzo scene, and I would not have bothered, except that it ties in with what's about to happen in 'Delicate', and there will be repercussions of that interaction as the story goes on.  The other reason I felt that it needed to be there, was because there is no way in hell that Sanzo would ever be able to hear all the yelling and thumping, etc.  going on right next door, and not go check it out.  I appreciate your comments about the moment of regret.  That was what I was hoping for, and that you saw it means that I did my job halfway decently.  ^_^

Reviewer: Uiuiui! Anonymous Date: 03/17/07 - 04:54AM Title: Chapter 5

You have a knack for his cleaning rituals, haven't you. Hits my softest spot. Go on!

Author's Response: Thank you for your review!  I think that the caring for another by cleansing them can be one of the most intimate and tender acts one can perform.  I'm glad that you think I have a 'knack', though!  That means it reads well, I hope.  I wanted to tie this incident back to the beginning of this stage of their relationship, so...  ^_^

Reviewer: Lauand Anonymous Date: 02/27/07 - 11:33AM Title: Chapter 1

I just wanted to say that I loved this story. The raw emotion, the angst, Gojyo's actions and Hakkai's reactions, so in character (or at least, as I imagine them), and the complex development after Hakkai got the limiter removed, instead of the easier "let's just punish Gojyo" option. A really delightful read. I just would have hoped for more closed ending, but that's just my hunger for more speaking, not a critic in any way.

Thank you for sharing this.

Author's Response: B-b-but it's not finished!  It's slow going, this piece, but there IS more on the way, I promise!

Reviewer: Firefairy Anonymous Date: 02/17/07 - 10:56AM Title: Chapter 1

This is really intense! And poor Hakkai! your description is rele good

Author's Response: Thanks for taking  the time to read it, and I appreciate the comment!  I have a bit of a thing for torturing poor Hakkai, I'm afraid.

Reviewer: gilliotina Anonymous Date: 01/31/07 - 03:18AM Title: Chapter 4

Oh dear, you like it the hard way, don't you? Another dance on the emotional edge, breathtaking& addicting.

Author's Response:

Aren't you just the sweetheart? Thanks so much!  I'm glad that you're liking it!  Hakkai angst is a bit of a drug for me, I admit!


Reviewer: gilliotina Anonymous Date: 12/11/06 - 12:54PM Title: Chapter 2

"Bring it on."

Shit, you're getting frightening good! Zan was right, you were hiding real talent. Would you please excuse my casual words and go on?

Author's Response: thanks!  I'm really just starting to get my feet wet, here.  More than happy to oblige!

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